103: Relationship Check: Chaser or Runner – Which One Are You?

Drop the BS w/ Dr. Kirleen

Have you ever questioned your role in this dance of love, or observed your partner sending mixed signals? In this episode, we will delve into the intriguing dynamic of the "runner-chaser" phenomenon that many individuals find themselves in. The chaser typically takes on the role of initiator, pushing for the relationship and yearning for love and acknowledgment, while the runner adopts a more distant, commitment-phobic stance, alternating between hot and cold behaviors, often sending mixed signals. Our goal is to explore both perspectives, understanding how past experiences might contribute to these patterns of behavior.

Key Takeaways: Know Your Attachment Style:

• Unearth the origins of your behavior by understanding attachment styles like anxious and insecure, rooted in childhood.

• Explore how these attachment styles shape your role as either a chaser or a runner in relationships.

Pay Attention to Defense Mechanisms:

• Spot the signs of defense mechanisms, including deflecting, constant blaming, or hot-and-cold behavior.

• Decode these red flags to gain insights into whether your partner is currently in a chaser or runner phase, fostering a healthier connection.

Healthy Doesn't Mean Perfect:

• Embrace the dance of a balanced relationship, where both partners take turns chasing and running.

• Acknowledge that imperfections are a natural part of the journey and commit to working through ups and downs for a resilient and lasting connection.

Guest Bio- Erika Chavez Pena M.ED., LPC
Erika Chavez Pena dedicated 21 years to the public education system, serving as a teacher for the deaf and hard of hearing and as a high school counselor. Transitioning to the role of a Licensed Professional Counselor, she has been actively engaged in the counseling profession for the past 6 years. During her early career as an educator, Erika cultivated a passion for public speaking, delivering presentations for students, parents, and community members. More recently, she expanded her expertise by providing training for Neely Counseling Center's Employee Assistance Program. Her presentations focus on the psychological and emotional well-being of individuals, emphasizing the importance of balancing emotional, cognitive, social, and physical aspects. Currently, Erika provides counseling services to adolescents, adults, and couples at Neely Counseling Center.

Resources/Things Mentioned During The Show
Need Counseling neelycounseling.com
Psychology Today https://www.psychologytoday.com/usInstagram - https://www.instagram.com/drkirleen/?hl=en
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