233 How Do I Stop Comparing Myself to Others and Learn to Live Me-Free?

Your Hope-Filled Perspective with Dr. Michelle Bengtson podcast

Episode Summary:

Do you constantly compare yourself with others? On social media, in your neighborhood, at church, or in the school drop-off lane, do you push yourself to prove that you measure up . . . and then feel ashamed when you don’t? Measuring yourself against others isn’t healthy. And it isn’t God’s plan. In fact, the way of Jesus is completely upside down from this measure-up world. He invites us to follow him and be restored to freedom, confidence, and joy. Join me with Shannon Popkin as we address how to stop comparing yourself to others.

Quotables from the episode:

• The constant effort to prove that I measure up (or try to hide when I don’t), does not lead to a life of freedom and joy. Here’s what does: learning to live me-free.
• At its root, comparison places value on our differences.
• Comparison is really a pride issue—it keeps us focused on ourselves.
• When we compare ourselves to others, we focus on how we measure up (or don’t) like lines on a measuring glass. But Jesus points out the spout—that place where we pour out on others.
• Comparison 1) distracts me from my purpose; 2) depletes my productivity, and 3) destroys our potential.
• When we fall prey to comparison, we need to ask ourselves “Is this something Jesus would say to me?”
• Comparison is a tactic of the enemy, whether we are comparing our appearance, our status, our sin, or even our ministry for Jesus to others’.
• Humility is a key to combatting comparison.
• Comparison is often bred because we don’t desire to be “less than” others, but in God’s economy those who are the least, are considered the greatest.
• There is NO exclusivity in the kingdom of God.
• Healthy comparison includes those times we are inspired and learn from others, and are then encouraged to be and do what I am uniquely called to do.
• Comparison divides us and causes us to back away, when God is calling us to move toward him!
• When tempted to compare yourself to others, ask yourself “who am I listening to?” Scripture says “my sheep know my voice,” so be sure you are listening for God’s voice.

Scripture References:

• Philippians 2:5-7 ESV Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus,[a] 6 who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped,[b] 7 but emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant
• James 3:14-15 ESV But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast and be false to the truth. 15 This is not the wisdom that comes down from above, but is earthly, unspiritual, demonic.
• Matthew 20:26-27 ESV But whoever would be great among you must be your servant,[c] 27 and whoever would be first among you must be your slave,[d] 28 even as the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve,

Recommended Resources:

• Comparison Girl: Lessons from Jesus on Me-Free Living in a Measure-Up World by Shannon Popkin
• Control Girl by Shannon Popkin
• The Hem of His Garment: Reaching Out to God When Pain Overwhelms by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• YouVersion 5-Day Devotional Reaching Out To God When Pain Overwhelms
• Today is Going to be a Good Day: 90 Promises to Start Your Day Off Right by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the AWSA 2023 Inspirational Gift Book of the Year Award, the Christian Literary Awards Reader’s Choice Award in four categories, and the Christian Literary Awards Henri Award for Devotionals
• YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be a Good Day
• YouVersion 7-Day Devotional, Today is Going to be Another Good Day
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip: How to Reclaim the Peace God Promises by Dr. Michelle Bengtson
• Breaking Anxiety’s Grip Free Study Guide
• Free 7-Day YouVersion Bible Reading Plan for Breaking Anxiety’s Grip
• Hope Prevails: Insights from a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
• Hope Prevails Bible Study by Dr. Michelle Bengtson, winner of the Christian Literary Award Reader’s Choice Award
• Trusting God Through Cancer 1
• Trusting God Through Cancer 2
• Revive & Thrive Women's Conference
• Subdue Stress and Anxiety: Fifteen Experts Offer Comprehensive Tools in Ten Minutes a Day. Use my link plus discount code BENG99 to save $90 on course (course will be $99.)
• Free Download: How To Fight Fearful/Anxious Thoughts and Win

Social Media Links for Guest and Host:

Connect with Shannon Popkin:

Website / Podcast / Facebook / Instagram / Twitter / YouTube

For more hope, stay connected with Dr. Bengtson at:

Order Book Breaking Anxiety’s Grip / Order Book Hope Prevails / Website / Blog / Facebook / Twitter (@DrMBengtson) / LinkedIn / Instagram / Pinterest / YouTube

Guest:

From the platform, page, and podcast mic, Shannon Popkin invites women to drink deeply of God’s story, and live like it’s true. Shannon’s books include Comparison Girl, and Control Girl, and she hosts the “Live Like It’s True” podcast. Shannon has been featured on FamilyLife Today, Revive Our Hearts, and Proverbs 31.

Shannon is happy to be sharing life with Ken, who makes her laugh every day. Together, they have the joy of watching their three young-adult kids become the amazing people God created them to be.

Hosted By: Dr. Michelle Bengtson Audio Technical Support: Bryce Bengtson