Accuse Me of Invalidating His Feelings

Why Does My Partner

Today we have an extra special episode of Why Does My Partner, as we welcome our special guest, Al Hoberman! Besides being the sound editor and producer of WDMP, Al is a music psychotherapist in private practice. He’s joining us for this listener question, which takes us down the rabbit hole of asking “Just what is a feeling anyway? How do you know when you’re having one, and what counts as ‘talking about them?’” We get into socialized gender roles, communicating without words, learning to tolerate disagreement, and creating a pausing practice to up your self-compassion.

Plus, finally we get to talk about Jules’ new book, Setting Boundaries That Stick: How Neurobiology Can Help You Rewire Your Brain to Feel Safe, Connected and Empowered. Available December 1st at a book seller near you!

Quotes:

"Even when someone doesn’t know how to talk about feelings…they’re being expressed in all sorts of ways that don’t involve words.”

“Any two people don’t really speak the same language. We have to learn each other.”

"Relational health means a having a high tolerance for disagreement."

"A tolerance for some disagreement is something that we have to be in if we’re gonna be vulnerable enough to share our real selves."

Share your questions with us at whydoesmypartner.com/contact

If you want to dive in deeper, consider attending our upcoming workshops. Learn more at whydoesmypartner.com/events

Mentioned in this episode:

WDMP Integrating Heart+Mind