Ep #140: ALL or NOTHING Mentality

Wannabe Balanced | MINDSET Coach

The ALL or NOTHING mentality is a cognitive distortion that results in depressions, anxiety, procrastination, binging, and completely sabotaging your progress. It's a black and white way of thinking, perfectionist syndrome, causing you to see reality in extremes.

It's good or it's bad... Right or wrong... Success or complete failure...

Where does this mentality stem from? I believe it's simply the natural evolution of the human experience. Just like new born babies are only able to see in black and white, but over time the begin to develop the ability to see shades of grey, and then even color.

Historically speaking, we come from generations of black and white thinking. Religion and politics are great examples of how this mentality has perpetuated over centuries.

Democrats and Republicans, heaven or hell, good vs. evil, true or false, worthy or unworthy. More often than not we find that one group believes they are right and everyone else is wrong.

No disrespect intended towards religion or politics, I believe humanity has come a long way in this arena.

This mentality has spilled over into a lot of parenting styles, then we wonder why we as adults struggle with this. Anyone come from a home where anything less than an A is unacceptable?

Believing that punishment and shame will keep us from doing "bad things", using fear as a motivator... it may have worked in the short-term, but look at the long-term repercussions.

Fear as a motivator is just not sustainable. It will never produce lasting results, it only keeps you stuck in unhealthy patterns.