Pillow Talks podcast

Player FM - Internet Radio Done Right

125 subscribers

추가했습니다 four 년 전

Vanessa & Xander Marin and Xander Marin | QCODE에서 제공하는 콘텐츠입니다. 에피소드, 그래픽, 팟캐스트 설명을 포함한 모든 팟캐스트 콘텐츠는 Vanessa & Xander Marin and Xander Marin | QCODE 또는 해당 팟캐스트 플랫폼 파트너가 직접 업로드하고 제공합니다. 누군가가 귀하의 허락 없이 귀하의 저작물을 사용하고 있다고 생각되는 경우 여기에 설명된 절차를 따르실 수 있습니다 https://ko.player.fm/legal.

The Unshakeables

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Inspiring Creativity & Community: CultureCon 35:06

7일 전35:06

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리스트

35:06

Imani Ellis has always believed community is a superpower. What began as a small gathering in her Harlem apartment grew into The Creative Collective NYC and CultureCon — one of the largest conferences celebrating creators of color. But behind the highlight reels and celebrity speakers, Imani’s journey has been defined by burnout, bold leaps and learning when to pause. In this episode, Ben and Kathleen sit down with Imani and explore what it takes to transform a passion project into a cultural movement. From balancing a demanding career at NBCUniversal with late-night CultureCon planning, to walking away from work at the height of burnout for a self-designed “creative residency” in Paris, Imani shares the realities of leadership, rest and why joy and community must stay at the center of her work. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.…

Pillow Talks explicit

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Meet Vanessa and Xander Marin, your new BFF couple friends! She’s a sex therapist with 20 years of experience and he’s a regular dude. Together they’re the shockingly open, slightly nerdy, and seriously funny couple you want to grab sushi with. They share the ups and downs in their relationship while giving you step-by-step techniques for improving yours. Subscribe for your weekly double date full of totally do-able sex tips, practical relationship advice, hilarious and honest stories of what really goes on behind closed bedroom doors, and so much more. It’s the sex education you WISH you’d had!

233 에피소드

#Fitness #Sexuality #Xander Marin #Vanessa And Xander Marin #Don't Get

Pillow Talks explicit

125 subscribers

updated 5일 전

시리즈 홈•Feed

233 에피소드

#Fitness #Sexuality #Xander Marin #Vanessa And Xander Marin #Don't Get

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Pillow Talks

1
E232: Trick or Treat: The Bedroom Edition 1:03:41

5일 전1:03:41

나중에 재생

리스트

1:03:41

This week’s episode is a little spooky , a little silly , and a whole lot of sexy. Since Halloween is tomorrow, we’re bringing you a “Trick or Treat: Smash or Pass” edition of Pillow Talks. We’re running through a list of playful, sometimes weird, and definitely conversation-starting ideas for you and your partner to try in the bedroom (or… maybe not). From holding water in your mouth during a BJ to wrapping your partner up like a mummy to switching positions every 60 seconds like it’s a HIIT workout… nothing is off-limits in this one. Some ideas are pure gold, some are questionable at best , and a few? Let’s just say they’re better left in the graveyard of “good intentions.” 💛 In this episode, you’ll hear: The spookiest sex trends we’ve ever been dared to try Which ones are worth a “smash” and which deserve a hard “pass” Why experimentation keeps things exciting — even if it’s a total fail How to decide what’s a hard pass vs. worth a try Why laughter and curiosity are the sexiest ingredients of all A few ideas that might just become your new Halloween tradition If your sex life could use a little more fun (and a few more giggles), this one’s your invitation to play. 🔥 Ready to learn new moves that actually work? Skip the spooky stuff and get straight to the good stuff inside The Ultimate Sex Guide, our fan-favorite resource that’ll help you feel confident, connected, and completely in control in the bedroom. You’ll get: Expert-backed techniques for better pleasure (solo and together) Real-life tips to improve communication and confidence Step-by-step guides to explore what really turns you on 👉 Grab The Ultimate Sex Guide and unlock your hottest tricks yet! http://vmtherapy.com/ultimate 🎧 Stay connected 📸 Follow us on Instagram → https://instagram.com/vanessaandxander 💌 Get our weekly emails with behind-the-scenes stories, expert tips, and a few good laughs → http://vmtherapy.com/subscribe 🎧 Never miss an episode! Subscribe to Pillow Talks wherever you listen to pods. ========================== THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS ========================== 👏Thanks Wild Alaskan. Get $35 off your first box of premium, wild-caught seafood. Get seafood you can trust. ➡︎ https://wildalaskan.com/PILLOW 👏Thanks Cozy Earth. Use code PILLOWTALKS to get up to 20% off. And if you get a Post-Purchase Survey, make sure to let them know you heard about Cozy Earth right here!➡︎ https://cozyearth.com 👏Thanks Masterclass. Our listeners get an additional 15% off any annual membership. ➡︎ https://masterclass.com/pillow Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices…

Pillow Talks

1
E231: When Life Gets Heavy (A Personal Update) 1:17:45

12일 전1:17:45

나중에 재생

리스트

1:17:45

We’ve always promised to keep things real with you — the good, the messy, and everything in between. And lately… life has been life-ing . In this episode, we’re opening up about what’s been going on behind the scenes — especially with Vanessa’s dad’s health — and how we’ve been navigating this season both personally and as a couple. We’ll talk about what’s next for our family, the emotional rollercoaster of managing grief while still finding moments of joy, and what it looks like to prioritize self-care, connection, and even intimacy when life feels really heavy. 💛 In this episode, you’ll hear: An honest update on Vanessa’s dad’s health and how our family is handling it The self-care practices helping me stay grounded (and sometimes just get through the day) What’s been helping us stay connected as a couple during stressful times The reality of sex and intimacy when you’re grieving or emotionally exhausted Why joy still matters, even when things are hard If you’re in a tough season too, this one’s for you. You’re not alone. 💛 🔥 Ready to feel more connected, supported, and understood in your relationship? Inside Deeper , our membership for couples, we help you keep growing together — even when life gets complicated. You’ll get access to expert-led guides, monthly live calls, and our favorite prompts and challenges to help you communicate, connect, and feel close again. 👉 Join Deeper today and start building the kind of relationship that can handle anything. https://vmtherapy.com/deeper 🎧 Stay connected 📸 Follow us on Instagram → https://instagram.com/vanessaandxander 💌 Get our weekly emails with behind-the-scenes stories, tips, and a few good laughs → http://vmtherapy.com/subscribe 🎧 Never miss an episode! Subscribe to Pillow Talks wherever you listen to pods. ========================== THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS ========================== 👏Thanks Blissy. Get better sleep, hair and skin with Blissy and use PILLOWPOD to get an additional 30% off. ➡︎https://blissy.com/pillowpod 👏Thanks Remi. Use code PILLOW at checkout for 50% off. ➡︎https://shopremi.com/PILLOW 👏Thanks ZocDoc. Stop putting off those doctors appointments and instantly book a top-rated doctor today. ➡︎https://Zocdoc.com/PILLOW 👏Thanks SKIMS. Shop SKIMS Fits Everybody collection. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows. ➡︎https://www.skims.com/pillow Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices…

Pillow Talks

1
E230 How to Actually Enjoy Oral Sex (Without Overthinking It) 1:01:40

19일 전1:01:40

나중에 재생

리스트

1:01:40

Let’s talk about oral. We’ve all had those moments where oral feels way more awkward than arousing. You’re lying there, overthinking everything: Do I smell weird? What do I do with my hands? Is my partner secretly counting down the seconds until it’s over? Sound familiar? Yeah… you’re definitely not alone. In this episode, we’re getting into the real, raw, and sometimes ridiculous reasons people struggle to fully relax and enjoy oral. We asked our community to spill their biggest insecurities, and let’s just say… you all delivered . From “I can’t stay present” to “I feel bad making him do it when I haven’t shaved,” nothing’s off-limits today. We’ll break down what’s actually going on behind those thoughts, and share practical, shame-free ways to feel more confident, connected, and turned on. 💋 Here’s what we’re diving into: The top 3 reasons people can’t relax during oral (and how to fix them). Why it’s okay if you don’t orgasm every time — seriously. How to ask for what you like without killing the vibe. What to do when your brain won’t stop screaming, “am I doing this right?!” And a few of our favorite “oral attitude adjustments.” Part real talk, part sex-ed, and part pep talk from your favorite couple who’s been there, done that… and yes, talked about it on a podcast. If you’ve ever been stuck in your head, overthinking, or trying to do it “right”… listen in… because you deserve oral to feel good. Like really good. 😘 🔥 Wanna take this week’s episode to the next level? Then it’s time to join The Ultimate Foreplay Experience. Our brand-new 4-week challenge that turns the Ultimate Foreplay Guides into a spicy, step-by-step adventure. Each week, you’ll tackle a new theme — fingering, hand jobs, oral, and blow jobs — with flirty assignments, trackable checklists, and a “Heat Map” to rate your favorite moves. It’s everything you need to turn “eh, same old routine” into “holy sh t, that was incredible.”* Get in on the challenge by grabbing the Ultimate Foreplay Guides before October 23rd → https://vmtherapy.com/foreplay 🎧 Stay connected 📸 Follow us on Instagram → https://instagram.com/vanessaandxander 💌 Get our weekly email — full of behind-the-scenes stories, expert tips, and way too many sex puns → http://vmtherapy.com/subscribe 🎧 Subscribe to Pillow Talks wherever you listen to podcasts! ========================== THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS ========================== 👏Thanks Audible Romance. Your first great love story is free when you sign up for a free 30-day trial ➡︎https://Audible.com/pillow 👏Thanks HungryRoot. For a limited time, use code PILLOW to get 40% off your first box PLUS get a free item in every box for life. ➡︎http://hungryroot.com/pillow Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices…

Pillow Talks

1
E229: Ask A Sex Therapist: Swallowing, Fetishes, + Exes 1:05:42

26일 전1:05:42

나중에 재생

리스트

1:05:42

Every week on Instagram, we host “Ask Us Anything” sessions. And honestly? We get way more questions than we could ever answer in stories. So today, we’re bringing some of those unanswered Qs straight to the podcast to give you deeper answers, real stories, and the honest, judgment-free advice you’ve been waiting for. Get ready, because we’re tackling some of your biggest, wildest curiosities about sex, intimacy, and relationships. 💛 Here’s what we’re getting into: Why some guys are so into swallowing (and what it really means). When “lasting too long” in bed becomes its own problem. How to tell your new partner about things you liked with an ex. What to do when you can’t seem to drop a fetish. Healing steps for survivors of sexual trauma who want a healthy sex life. What happens when you both want the other person to initiate. And that’s just the beginning — this episode is packed with your real questions and our no-BS answers. 🔗 Links & Resources Ready to uncover your unique intimacy blueprint? Take our free Intimacy Quiz and learn the key that drives your connection: 👉🏻 https://vmtherapy.com/5keys Treat your partner to the best foreplay they’ve ever had 👉🏻 The Ultimate Foreplay Guides http://vmtherapy.com/foreplay Learn how to initiate with confidence 👉🏻The Art of Initiation https://vmtherapy.com/initiation Unlock expert tools, our core course library, and more inside our membership 👉🏻 Deeper https://vmtherapy.com/deeper 🎧 Stay connected 📸 Follow us on Instagram ➡️ ** https://instagram.com/vanessaandxander** 💌 Get our weekly email — with behind-the-scenes stories, expert tips, and plenty of flirty fun. Sign up here 👉 https://vmtherapy.com/subscribe 🎧 Never miss an episode! Subscribe to Pillow Talks wherever you listen to pods. Timestamps 00:00 – Intro 03:00 – Why are guys so into swallowing? 11:04 – My partner lasts too long in bed 22:47 – How do I bring up things an ex used to do to me with my partner? 30:54 – Scheduling sex feels awkward—how do I get over that? 39:52 – How to get over a fetish 47:30 – How to reassure your partner with ED 56:19 – How SA survivors can have a great sex life 58:31 – What to do if we both want the other partner to initiate ========================== THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS ========================== 👏Thanks Audible Romance. Your first great love story is free when you sign up for a free 30-day trial ➡︎https://Audible.com/pillow 👏Thanks Cure. Use code PILLOW for 20% off your first order ➡︎http://curehydration.com/pillow 👏Thanks Cozy Earth. Use code PILLOWTALKS for up to 20% off! And if you get a Post-Purchase Survey, make sure to let them know you heard about Cozy Earth right here!. ➡︎https://cozyearth.com 👏Thanks OneSkin. Get 15% off OneSkin with the code PILLOW ➡︎https://oneskin.co/HAIR Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices…

Pillow Talks

1
E228: Breaking Down A Real-Life Text Fight (pt 2.) 1:06:00

5 weeks 전1:06:00

나중에 재생

리스트

1:06:00

You’ve been there: the dreaded text fight. One message gets misread, emotions spike, and suddenly you’re both typing paragraphs instead of actually talking. In this episode, we’re breaking down a real-life text fight between a couple navigating mismatched sex drives, rejection, and the heavy mental load of parenting. You’ll hear the raw back-and-forth and get our thoughts on what worked, what didn’t, and how to move these conversations toward connection instead of conflict. 💛 In this episode, you’ll learn: Why so many couples end up fighting about sex over text (and why it almost never goes well). Why text is the worst place to argue (and how to get out of the spiral). The hidden emotional needs behind “yes” and “no.” How to express hurt feelings without slipping into blame. How to validate your partner without abandoning your own boundaries. Communication tips that will help you feel heard and understood — even in the heat of the moment. If you’ve ever found yourself stuck in a text fight with your partner, this one’s for you. 👉 Ready to uncover your unique intimacy blueprint? Take our free Intimacy Quiz and learn the key that drives your connection: 👉🏻 https://vmtherapy.com/5keys 🎧 Stay connected 📸 Follow us on Instagram ➡️ @vanessaandxander 💌 Get our weekly email — with behind-the-scenes stories, expert tips, and plenty of sex puns. Sign up here 👉 https://vmtherapy.com/subscribe 🎧 Never miss an episode! Subscribe to Pillow Talks wherever you listen to pods. ========================== THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS ========================== 👏Thanks Nature's Sunshine. Use the code PILLOW at check out to get 20% off your first order plus free shipping ➡︎https://www.naturessunshine.com 👏Thanks Wild Alaskan. Get $35 off your first box of wild-caught, sustainable seafood—delivered right to your door. ➡︎https://www.wildalaskan.com/pillow 👏Thanks Chewy. Chewy has everything you need to keep your pet happy and healthy. And right now you can save $20 on your first order and get free shipping. ➡︎https://chewpanions.chewy.com/vanessandxander 👏Thanks Remi. Use code PILLOW at checkout for 50% off. ➡︎https://shopremi.com/PILLOW Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices…

Pillow Talks

1
E227: Initiation: What You’re Getting Wrong And How To Get It Right 1:00:51

6 weeks 전1:00:51

나중에 재생

리스트

1:00:51

Hot take: when you finally get initiation right, your entire sex life opens up. Think about it. No more awkward “was that supposed to be a signal?” moments. No more pressure on just one person to get things started. And no more cycle of rejection and resentment. When initiation feels fun, confident, and mutual, everything else in your sex life starts to feel easier, more connected, and a lot more exciting. We’re back with a re-air of one of our most popular episodes ever, because initiation is one of the biggest challenges couples face. 💛 In this episode, you’ll learn: The biggest mistakes couples make when it comes to initiation (and what to do instead). Why one partner often feels all the pressure, and how to change it up and share the spark. How to shift from frustration and rejection to connection and desire. Practical strategies to make initiation feel exciting, flirty, fun, and hot again. If you’ve ever felt frustrated, annoyed, or even rejected by your partner’s initiation attempts (or lack of them), this conversation will help you see both sides of the equation and give you totally do-able techniques you can try tonight. 🔥 $40 FLASH SALE : Art Of Initiation 🔥 We’re doing something we’ve never done before. For this weekend only, get our top-selling course, Art of Initiation , for just $40 (normally $89). That’s more than 50% off! Now through Sunday, September 28, 2025 Inside, you’ll learn how to initiate in ways that actually feel amazing for both of you. Trust us, it’s a total game-changer. 👉 Grab AOI here: vmtherapy.com/initiation and use code FLASH40 at checkout. Links & Resources 👉 E73: Do You Ever “Owe” Sex To Your Partner?: https://vmtherapy.com/episode73 👉 What’s Your Sex Drive Type? Free Download: https://free.vmtherapy.com/sex-drive-type 👉 E38: You Want Connection, Your Partner Wants Sex. Who Comes First?: https://vmtherapy.com/episode38 👉 E183: How To Get More Emotional Intimacy From Your Partner https://vmtherapy.com/episode183 🎧 Stay connected 📸 Follow us on Instagram ➡️ instagram.com/vanessaandxander 💌 Get our weekly email with behind-the-scenes stories, expert tips, and so many sex puns. Sign up here 👉🏻 vmtherapy.com/subscribe 🎧 Never miss an episode! Subscribe to Pillow Talks wherever you listen to pods. ========================== THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS ========================== 👏Thanks Skims. Shop SKIMS Fits Everybody collection at SKIMS.com. After you place your order, be sure to let them know we sent you! Select "podcast" in the survey and be sure to select our show in the dropdown menu that follows. ➡︎ https://www.skims.com/pillow 👏Thanks goPure. Use the code PILLOW to get 25% off ➡︎ https://gopure.com 👏Thanks Cowboy Colostrum. Get 25% off when you use the code PILLOW. ➡︎ https://www.cowboycolostrum.com 👏Thanks Hungryroot. Use code pillow to get 40% off your first box and a free item of your choice for life➡︎ https://Hungryroot.com/pillow Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices…

Pillow Talks

1
E226: Foreplay Frustrations: How to Get More (and Better) Foreplay 1:04:54

7 weeks 전1:04:54

나중에 재생

리스트

1:04:54

Did you know that 64% of people say they want more foreplay than they currently get ? And most people say they wish it was part of every sexual experience. No wonder foreplay frustrations are so common. Maybe it feels too short, too routine, or like your partner just doesn’t quite “get it.” The truth? Foreplay isn’t just a warm-up. It’s one of the most powerful ways to feel connected, build anticipation, and experience more pleasure (especially since only 10–15% of women orgasm from intercourse alone). 💛 In this episode, we cover: Does foreplay actually count as sex? How to ask for more foreplay without hurting your partner’s feelings. Types of foreplay beyond handjobs and BJs—like massage, sensory play, toys, and even “choreplay.” What to do when one of you wants more foreplay and the other wants less. How to talk about your fantasies without feeling awkward. Tips for breaking out of a foreplay rut and keeping it playful. What to do when your favorite turn-on is your partner’s turn-off. And yes… whether it’s okay to not really be into foreplay at all. Foreplay can (and should) be one of the most exciting and intimate parts of your sex life. And after this episode, you’ll have the tools to make it way more fun, connected, and satisfying for both of you. ✨ Want more foreplay inspiration? Check out our Ultimate Foreplay Guides . Next level techniques and step-by-step instructions, let’s just say, these guides are our #1 best-seller for a reason! ⁠ Links & Resources 👉🏻 Get The Ultimate Foreplay Guides here: http://vmtherapy.com/foreplay 👉🏻 A Survivor's Guide To Reclaiming Your Sex Life After Abuse here: https://vmtherapy.com/freebies 🎧 Stay connected 📸 Follow us on Instagram ➡️ instagram.com/vanessaandxander 💌 Get our weekly email — with behind-the-scenes stories, expert tips, and so many sex puns. Sign up here 👉🏻 vmtherapy.com/subscribe 🎧 Never miss an episode! Subscribe to Pillow Talks wherever you listen to pods! ⏰ Timestamps 00:00 – Intro 10:54 – When your partner won’t give foreplay 18:25 – Tips for talking about foreplay 23:25 – Exploring different types of foreplay 31:00 – I want more foreplay, my partner wants less: finding middle ground 37:55 – How to start the conversation about foreplay 40:47 – How to mix things up in the bedroom 45:49 – I don’t want to give blowjobs, but my partner loves them 55:54 – Women who don’t like foreplay ========================== THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS ========================== 👏Thanks ZocDoc. Stop putting off those doctors appointments and start book a top-rated doctor today. ➡︎https://zocdoc.com/pillow 👏Thanks Cozy Earth. Use code PILLOWTALKS for 40% off! And if you get a Post-Purchase Survey, make sure to let them know you heard about Cozy Earth right here!➡︎https://cozyearth.com 👏Thanks Live It Up. Use code PILLOW for 15% off your first Super Greens order! ➡︎https://letsliveitup.com/pillow 👏Thanks Audible. Your first great love story is free when you sign up for a free 30-day trial! ➡︎https://Audible.com/pillow Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices…

Pillow Talks

1
E225: The Truth About Sex and Aging: Menopause, Erectile Dysfunction, and Libido 1:03:38

8 weeks 전1:03:38

나중에 재생

리스트

1:03:38

Aging is inevitable. But letting your sex life fade away? Nope. This week, we’re tackling one of our most requested topics ever : sex and aging. We’re answering your biggest questions about how intimacy shifts as the years go by: from libido changes, to navigating menopause, to keeping things hot. 💛 In this episode, we cover: How old is too old to have sex (spoiler: never) What to do if your libido and your partner’s don’t line up anymore Navigating perimenopause and helping your partner understand it’s not about them Feeling sexy in a body that doesn’t look like it did at 20 How to manage vaginal dryness, erectile changes, and shifting anatomy Creative ways to keep intimacy exciting even when it feels like you’ve “done it all” And you’ll also hear sweet (and funny) messages from listeners who say that sex in midlife and beyond is actually the best sex they’ve ever had. You’ll also hear some of our favorite messages from listeners in their 40s, 50s, 60s (and beyond!) about why sex actually gets freer, hotter, and more confident with age. Because here’s the thing: aging is inevitable. But a boring sex life? That’s optional. ✨ Ready to spice things up at any age? Our Ultimate Sex Guide is your roadmap to better intimacy. Inside, you’ll find: 42 step-by-step positions with illustrations, tips, and playful modifications A workbook + printable cards to track your favorites (and keep things exciting) Expert tips and troubleshooting for when sex doesn’t go as planned An audio version so you can get quick, shame-free guidance anytime Whether you’re looking for fresh inspiration or new ways to connect, The Ultimate Sex Guide will help you discover just how good sex can get! Check it out here 👉🏻 https://vmtherapy.com/ultimate Links & Resources Get our sex positions playbook here 👉🏻 https://vmtherapy.com/ultimate E215 Mismatched Sex Drive Types: The #1 Reason Couples Struggle With Desire 👉🏻 https://vmtherapy.com/episode215 E121 When She Wants It More: Navigating Mismatched Libidos When The Woman Has A Higher Drive 👉🏻 https://vmtherapy.com/episode121 🎧 Stay connected 📸 Follow us on Instagram ➡️ instagram.com/vanessaandxander 💌 Get our weekly email — with behind-the-scenes stories, expert tips, and so many sex puns. Sign up here 👉🏻 vmtherapy.com/subscribe 🎧 Never miss an episode! Subscribe to Pillow Talks wherever you listen to pods! Timestamps 00:00 – Intro 03:38 – How old is too old to have se x? 11:12 – How does libido change with age? 16:22 – When does a drop in libido become a health concern? 19:18 – Navigating perimenopause with your partner 33:31 – Body image and aging 39:34 – Best se x positions for older couples 44:34 – Vaginal dryness and aging 46:18 – Does your labia shrink or change with age? 49:52 – How to keep your sex life exciting as you get older 54:03 – Trouble staying hard as you age ========================== THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS ========================== 👏Thanks Hungryroot. Use code pillow to get 40% off your first box and a free item of your choice for life➡︎https://Hungryroot.com/pillow 👏Thanks Chewy. Chewy has everything you need to keep your pet happy and healthy. You can save $20 on your first order and get free shipping!➡︎https://chewpanions.chewy.com/@vanessandxander 👏Thanks Cure. Use code PILLOW for 20% off your first order! ➡︎https://curehydration.com/pillow 👏Thanks MasterClass. Get an additional 15% off any annual membership ➡︎https://masterclass.com/pillow Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices…

Pillow Talks

1
E224: The Beginner’s Guide to Sex Toys & Tools 1:04:46

9 weeks 전1:04:46

나중에 재생

리스트

1:04:46

There is absolutely zero shame in using toys in the bedroom. In fact, they can be a game-changer for pleasure, intimacy, and just plain fun. Whether you’re curious about where to start, nervous about how your partner might react, or worried about your kids (or pets!) discovering your stash, we’re covering it all in today’s episode. We’re also sharing some of the funniest (and most relatable) real-life sex toy stories you sent us. Because if you’ve ever had a vibrator confiscated by your toddler or opened a box of anal beads in front of your in-laws, you are definitely not alone. 💛 Here’s what we’re diving into: The best starter toy for women How to talk to your partner about wanting to use toys (without hurting their feelings) Whether orgasms feel different with a toy Why it’s totally normal if toys aren’t your thing Talking to men about male sex toys Using toys solo vs. with a partner How often to use toys (and why your partner should never “hand you off” to one) The best ways to store your toys so kids or family don’t stumble across them Hilarious (and mortifying) real-life mishaps from our listeners If you’ve ever had questions about sex toys and tools or just want a good laugh at the stories we’ve collected — this one’s for you. Resources & Links: Our sex toy recommendations ➡️ https://vmtherapy.com/recommended-products Episode 172 How to Bring Toys Into the The Bedroom Without Making it Weird ➡️ https://vmtherapy.com/episode172 ❤️ Ready to go deeper? Sex toys are just one way to keep things fun and connected in your relationship. Inside our monthly membership Deeper , you’ll get: Expert-led guides and courses on intimacy, pleasure, and communication Two brand-new date night ideas every month (one cute, one sexy) Monthly live calls with us where you can ask us your questions directly Unlimited access to Vanessa AI — your 24/7 virtual sex + relationship coach A private, supportive community of couples working on the same goals Whether you’re brand-new to exploration in the bedroom or just looking for fresh ways to connect, Deeper gives you all the tools, tips, and real-talk support to make your relationship feel exciting again. 💛 Learn more at vmtherapy.com/deeper 🎧 Stay connected 📸 Follow us on Instagram ➡️ https://instagram.com/vanessaandxander 💌 Get our weekly email — with behind-the-scenes stories, expert tips, and so many sex puns. Sign up here 👉🏻 vmtherapy.com/subscribe 🎧 Never miss an episode! Subscribe to Pillow Talks wherever you listen to pods! Timestamps 00:00 – Intro 04:21 – Safety tips: What “For Novelty Use Only” really means 11:11 – Best beginner toy for women 19:24 – How to talk to your husband about toys (without hurting his feelings) 26:21 – Will your orgasm feel different with a toy? 29:03 – Is it normal to not enjoy toys? 30:26 – Can toys make pleasure harder without them? 37:57 – Male partners trying toys for the first time 43:48 – What if you only want to use toys solo (not with a partner)? 48:44 – Should you use toys every time? 53:50 – How to store toys discreetly 55:43 – Funny toy stories ========================== THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS ========================== 👏Thanks OneSkin. Get 15% off OneSkin with the code PILLOW ➡︎https://www.oneskin.co/ 👏Thanks Cozy Earth. Use code PILLOWTALKS for 40% off! And if you get a Post-Purchase Survey, make sure to let them know you heard about Cozy Earth right here!➡︎https://cozyearth.com 👏Thanks Blissy. Get better sleep, hair and skin with Blissy and use PILLOWPOD to get an additional 30% off ➡︎https://blissy.com/PILLOWPOD 👏Thanks Audible. Your first great love story is free when you sign up for a free 30-day trial! ➡︎https://Audible.com/pillow Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices…

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E223: Sex After Baby: Postpartum Sex, Intimacy & Desire 1:05:46

10 weeks 전1:05:46

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1:05:46

The postpartum stage can be one of the hardest (and least talked about) seasons a couple will ever go through. Your relationship changes. Your body changes. Your sex life changes. And with all of that comes a swirl of feelings you might not have expected: Resentment toward your partner A crushing imbalance in the mental load Feeling “touched out” 24/7 Nervousness (or fear) about having sex again Worries about your body never feeling — or looking — the same The awkward, elephant-in-the-room disconnection that can build over months In this episode, we’re answering YOUR most personal, vulnerable questions about intimacy and connection after having kids — from being scared to get pregnant again, to changes in sensation, to finding your spark when you feel more like co-managers than romantic partners. 💛 Here’s what we’re covering: Why being “cleared” for sex at 6 weeks doesn’t mean you have to be ready How to break the silence when it’s been months (or longer) since you’ve been intimate What to do if sex is painful after a tear or complicated delivery Navigating body image, “too loose” worries, and changes in arousal triggers How to reconnect when parenting has taken over every ounce of energy Advice for partners who struggle to see their spouse sexually after birth The most powerful way a partner can make a new mom feel truly seen, appreciated, and desired Whether you’re weeks postpartum or years down the road, this conversation is a reminder that you’re not broken, you’re not alone, and you can find your way back to each other. 👩‍👩‍👧 Raise safe, smart & shame-free kids — and build a lifetime of trust so you’re the one they turn to. From “Where do babies come from?” to “What does 69 mean?” 😳, Beyond the Birds & the Bees gives you the exact words to say in just 5–7 minutes per topic. A complete digital parenting tool-kit. Think bite-sized, age-by-age audio guides and real-life scripts make even the trickiest conversations easier — so your kids learn about sex, consent, identity, and relationships from you, not TikTok. Start today ➡️ https://vmtherapy.com/kids 🎧 Stay connected 📸 Follow us on Instagram ➡️ https://instagram.com/vanessaandxander 💌 Get our weekly email — with behind-the-scenes stories, expert tips, and so many sex puns. Sign up here 👉🏻 vmtherapy.com/subscribe 🎧 Never miss an episode! Subscribe to Pillow Talks wherever you listen to pods! ========================== THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS ========================== 👏Thanks Live It Up. Use code PILLOW for 15% off your first Super Greens order! ➡︎https://letsliveitup.com/pillow 👏Thanks Lola Blankets. Use code PILLOW and get 35% off your entire order. Experience the world’s #1 blanket with Lola Blankets.➡︎https://lolablankets.com/ 👏Thanks Hungryroot. Use code PILLOW to get 40% off your first box and a free item of your choice for life. ➡︎https://hungryroot.com/pillow 👏Thanks Cozy Earth. Use code PILLOWTALKS for 40% off! And if you get a Post-Purchase Survey, make sure to let them know you heard about Cozy Earth right here! ➡︎https://cozyearth.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices…

Pillow Talks

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E222: The AI Girlfriend: How to Protect Your Relationship from Artificial Intimacy 1:09:55

11 weeks 전1:09:55

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리스트

1:09:55

Imagine this: your partner sits you down and says they want to open your marriage… Not for a real-life person. But for their AI companion . Sounds like a Black Mirror episode, right? But it’s real. In today’s episode, we’re diving into the wild, complicated, and very real intersection of AI and relationships. From romantic connections with chatbots to emotional venting with AI companions, technology is evolving faster than most of us are prepared for. And it’s already showing up in our love lives in some unexpected (and sometimes unsettling) ways. Whether you’re curious, skeptical, or straight-up concerned, this is a conversation every couple needs to have. Here’s what we’re getting into: The Reddit story that left us both speechless (yes, he wants a throuple with his AI girlfriend 😳) Why saying “I don’t use AI” isn’t a real boundary anymore The emotional intimacy trap: how AI companions are starting to meet very human needs Why venting to AI can quietly erode real-life connection The most important questions to ask your partner now about tech, boundaries, and connection How to use AI intentionally to strengthen your relationship (not threaten it) Real-life examples of how AI can either divide or deepen your bond 🔗 Links + Resources How to Safeguard Your Relationship From AI We made you a free guide to help you have the talk about AI and your relationship. Download it here now 👉🏻 https://free.vmtherapy.com/ai 💬 Want even more support? Inside Deeper , our monthly membership, you get access to: Vanessa AI: a relationship-focused tool that’s trained NOT to cross boundaries Our entire library of core courses + guides on intimacy, sex, and relationships Monthly coaching calls with us and two date night ideas every month (one cute, one spicy 😉) 💛 Learn more at vmtherapy.com/deeper 🎧 Stay connected 📸 Follow us on Instagram ➡️ https://instagram.com/vanessaandxander 💌 Get our weekly email — with behind-the-scenes stories, expert tips, and so many sex puns. Sign up here 👉🏻 vmtherapy.com/subscribe 🎧 Never miss an episode! Subscribe to Pillow Talks wherever you listen to pods! ========================== THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS ========================== 👏Thanks Audible Romance. Your first great love story is free when you sign up for a free 30-day trial. ➡︎https://audible.com/pillow 👏Thanks ZocDoc. Stop putting off those doctors appointments and start book a top-rated doctor today. ➡︎https://zocdoc.com/pillow 👏Thanks Blissy. Blissy is offering 60-nights risk-free PLUS an additional 30% off when you shop. ➡︎https://blissy.com/PILLOWPOD 👏Thanks Cure. Get 20% off your first order. ➡︎https://curehydration.com/PILLOW Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices…

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E221: How to Explore Your Kinks Without Shame (Cuckolding, Pegging, Breeding, and more) 1:09:21

12 weeks 전1:09:21

나중에 재생

리스트

1:09:21

Ever wondered why you have a certain kink? Or if it’s OK to fantasize about someone else during sex? Or maybe you’ve been curious about cuckolding, breeding kinks, or pegging… but didn’t know who to ask. Well some of you asked us! And today, we’re answering your questions about kinks and fantasies. From the psychology of desire to navigating mismatches with your partner, we’re tackling the wild, the vulnerable, and the deeply human side of sexual exploration (as always, with zero shame and plenty of insight). Whether you’re curious, cautious, or kinky AF, this episode is packed with permission, perspective, and practical advice. Let’s get into it. 💛 Here’s what we’re covering: - Why we have kinks (and why you don’t need a “reason” to justify them) - The most common sexual fantasies and what they really mean - The difference between a fantasy and a desire (and how to safely explore both) - Can you fantasize about someone else during sex with your partner? - What to do when your fantasy doesn’t match your partner’s - How to explore pegging, role reversal, and butt stuff (without shame) - The sex club fantasy (that’s not about group sex) - Navigating gender play, lingerie, and makeup with confidence 🔗 Links & Resources - Episode 53: How To Spice It Up In The Bedroom: Exploring Kink For Beginners 👉🏻 https://vmtherapy.com/episode53 - Justin Lehmiller’s Tell Me What You Want (Science of Sexual Fantasies) 👉🏻 https://sexualhealthalliance.com/justin-lehmiller-science-of-fantasy - Episode 213: What Do Men REALLY Think About…? Part 3 (Doggy Style, Aging, Leg Hair & More!) 👉🏻https://vmtherapy.com/episode213 ❤️ Ready to go deeper? Your questions deserve more than just a quick answer. Inside our monthly membership Deeper, we help you actually take the next step — with expert-designed tools, guided content, live sessions with us, and unlimited access to Vanessa AI (your 24/7 virtual sex and relationship coach). 🎉 Podcast listeners get 25% off your first month! Use the code PILLOW at checkout right here 👉🏻 https://vmtherapy.com/deeper ✅ Stay Connected 📸 Follow us on Instagram ➡️ https://instagram.com/vanessaandxander 💌 Get our weekly email — with behind-the-scenes stories, expert tips, and so many sex puns. Sign up here 👉🏻 vmtherapy.com/subscribe 🎧 Never miss an episode! Subscribe to Pillow Talks wherever you listen to pods! Timestamps 00:00 – Why we have kinks 08:27 – 7 most common fantasies 11:25 – Difference between kinks and fantasy 19:03 – Cuckolding 25:30 – Fantasizing about other people during secs 30:15 – Breeding kink 32:32 – Sex club with spouse 39:15 – MMF threesome vs. MFF 43:46 – Male anal play & pegging ================================= THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS ================================= 👏Thanks Remi. Use code PILLOW at checkout for 50% off. ➡︎ https://shopremi.com/PILLOW 👏 Thanks Splash Blanket. Use code PILLOWTALK for 15% off. ➡︎ https://splashblanket.com 👏Thank you goPure. Get 25% Off with code PILLOW ➡︎ https://www.gopurebeauty.com/pillow 👏Thank you Cozy Earth. Use my code PILLOWTALKS for 40% off. And if you get a Post-Purchase Survey, make sure to let them know you heard about Cozy Earth right here!➡︎ https://cozyearth.com /PILLOWTALKS Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices…

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E220: A Partner’s Guide To The Female Orgasm 59:17

13 weeks 전59:17

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리스트

59:17

The female orgasm: we’ve talked about it a lot over the years, but it never stops being one of the most requested, most misunderstood, and most fascinating topics we cover. In this episode, we’re flipping the script and looking at orgasm through a partner’s eyes. What does it mean to be supportive? How can you tell if she’s actually orgasming? And why is it so inconsistent? We’re answering your most Googled questions, plus the ones you’ve been too embarrassed to type into a search bar. Here’s what we’re getting into: Why women fake orgasms (and what to do about it) What to say if your partner has never had one before How to know if she’s really having an orgasm The truth about female performance anxiety Which positions are best for helping her O How to help her experience multiple orgasms G-spot orgasms and squirting: can you make them happen? What to do while she’s orgasming (hint: don’t freeze!) How to make it last longer + aftercare 🎓 Check out Finishing School™ 💦 And if you haven’t heard, we’re also celebrating the 10-year anniversary of Finishing School! It’s our proven, step-by-step course that helps women finally experience reliable, pleasurable orgasms. Whether you’ve never had one or you want to deepen your pleasure even more, this course will meet you exactly where you are. Here’s what’s inside: A full, technique-driven curriculum to teach you how to have as many orgasms as you want, whenever you want The Pleasure Bundle: Ultimate Foreplay Guides + Ultimate Sex Guide 3 months unlimited access to Vanessa AI 2 LIVE Support Track Coaching Calls with us! Lifetime access to go at your own pace And a 30-day, pleasure-guaranteed, money-back promise 💛 It’s personal for me (Vanessa). I struggled with orgasm for years (even as a sex therapist) and this course is everything I wish I’d had. 👉🏻 Go to https://vmtherapy.com/orgasm to discover just how good it can get. 👉🏻 Access The Truth About Female Orgasm Replay https://free.vmtherapy.com/truth 🎧 Stay connected 📸 Follow us on Instagram ➡️ https://instagram.com/vanessaandxander 💌 Get our weekly email — with behind-the-scenes stories, expert tips, and so many sex puns. Sign up here 👉🏻 vmtherapy.com/subscribe 🎧 Never miss an episode! Subscribe to Pillow Talks wherever you listen to pods! ⏰ Timestamps: 00:00 – Intro 04:00 – Why do women fake it? 12:50 – How to be a supportive partner 25:38 – Can I tell if she's orgasming? 26:25 – Do some women not need to finish? 31:45 – Can women have performance anxiety about orgasms? 33:06 – Best positions for female pleasure 38:27 – Why are female orgasms inconsistent? 42:56 – How do I get my wife to have more than one 0? 46:42 – G-spot orgasms and squirting 47:58 – What am I supposed to do while she’s coming? 49:33 – How to make your partner’s 0 last longer ================================= THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS ================================= 👏Thanks Quince. Free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. ➡︎ https://quince.com/pillow 👏 Thanks Chewy. Save $20 on your first order with free shipping.➡︎ https://chewy.com/pillows 👏Thank you Hungryroot. Get 40% off your first box and a free item of your choice for LIFE. ➡︎ https://hungryroot.com/pillow 👏Thank you Audible Romance. Your first great love story is free when you sign up for a free 30-day trial. ➡︎ https://audible.com/pillow Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices…

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E219: The Truth About Female Orgasm: Your Q’s Answered! 1:03:35

14 weeks 전1:03:35

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리스트

1:03:35

You’ve probably heard people say, “Oh, you’ll just know.” But what if… you don’t know? 👀 This week, we’re diving deep into one of Vanessa’s all-time favorite topics (and the one she first became known for as a sex therapist!): the female orgasm . Whether you’re wondering if you’ve ever actually had one, struggling to feel much of anything, or just desperate to experience the kind of toe-curling, body-melting release you’ve seen in movies — this episode is for you. 💦 We’re answering your most personal, vulnerable, and downright relatable questions like: “How do I know if it was an orgasm ?” “It felt good… but it was short — does that count?” “Everyone says I’ll ‘just know’ but I’m still not sure. HELP.” “I’ve only ever had ‘mini’ orgasms — is there something wrong with me?” “What leg positions help or hurt the chance of orgasming?” “Does a full bladder make orgasms feel stronger?” “What does a vaginal orgasm even feel like and how do I know if I’ve had one?” Vanessa also opens up about her own experience struggling with orgasm (yes, even as a sex therapist), what finally changed things, and the biggest myths that keep women stuck. And if you’ve been feeling overwhelmed, broken, or like you missed the memo on pleasure… this episode will remind you that you’re not alone — and there is a path forward. ✨ PLUS: If you’re a woman who’s struggled with orgasm (or never had one), check out our course Finishing School — the step-by-step system that’s helped thousands of women finally get there. Visit vmtherapy.com/orgasm to learn more. 💛 What You'll Hear: The most common signs of orgasm (and why they can look different for every body) Real questions from listeners who aren’t sure if they’ve had one yet Why some orgasms feel big and some feel… meh The orgasm “standard” we’ve all been sold by Hollywood Practical tips for recognizing and expanding your pleasure How Vanessa’s own orgasm journey inspired her to create Finishing School 🎧 Stay connected: 📸 Follow us on Instagram ➡️ https://instagram.com/vanessaandxander 💌 Get our weekly email — with behind-the-scenes stories, expert tips, and so many sex puns. Sign up here 👉🏻 vmtherapy.com/subscribe 🎧 Never miss an episode! Subscribe to Pillow Talks wherever you listen to pods! ============================ THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS ============================ 👏Thanks Remi. Give your teeth a break without breaking the bank with Remi and save up to 50%. ➡︎ https://shopremi.com/PILLOW 👏Thanks Alloy. Get $20 off your first order today. ➡︎ https://myalloy.com/PILLOW 👏Thanks Cozy Earth. Get an exclusive discount for up to 40% off. ➡︎ https://cozyearth.com/pillowtalks 👏Thanks Wild Alaskan. Get $35 off your first box of premium, wild-caught seafood. ➡︎ https://wildalaskan.com/PILLOW Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices…

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E218 Got the Ick? Why It Happens in Relationships + What to Do About It pt. 2 1:02:46

15 weeks 전1:02:46

나중에 재생

리스트

1:02:46

You thought last week’s icks were bad? Buckle up, friend. Because in Part 2, we’re getting into the next-level icks — the ones that make you question everything. Like… oral sex immediately after intercourse. Or the dreaded dick flop. Or your partner’s casual approach to burping, farting, and forgetting what deodorant is. These icks go way beyond open-mouth chewing. We’re talking postpartum rage, peeing with the door open (or worse… the sound ), and the surprisingly common hygiene habits that leave you wondering if love really can survive it all. 💛 Here’s what we’re serving up for you: The hygiene ick that made one woman reconsider everything Why flopping a penis around is not a valid form of initiation (seriously, stop) Oral after sex: hot or gross? Postpartum icks that no one warns you about Peeing, poor aim, and other bathroom-related turn-offs The financial icks that hit harder than expected 🎧 Basically, if you’ve ever looked at your partner and thought “ew”… this one’s for you. ‘Cause you know what? Sometimes laughing really is the best medicine. 🔗 Links & Resources EPISODE 46: The Hygiene Episode ➡️ https://vmtherapy.com/episode46 EPISODE 198: Stop Doing THIS If You Want More Sex ➡️ https://vmtherapy.com/episode198 ❤️ Ready to go deeper? Let’s be honest, everyone has an ick or two. But if you’re feeling more disconnected, more irritable, or less turned on than you’d like… it might be time to reconnect in a more intentional way. Inside our monthly membership Deeper , we help you explore what really turns you on —mentally, emotionally, and physically. You’ll get access to our member library of courses and guides , plus live calls, date night ideas, and support from a like-minded community. Because when you’re truly connected… the little things don’t ick you out as much. 👉 Join Deeper today. Because intimacy is the whole point. https://vmtherapy.com/deeper 🎧 Stay connected: 📸 Follow us on Instagram ➡️ https://instagram.com/vanessaandxander 💌 Get our weekly email — with behind-the-scenes stories, expert tips, and so many sex puns. Sign up here 👉🏻 vmtherapy.com/subscribe 🎧 Never miss an episode! Subscribe to Pillow Talks wherever you listen to pods! ================================== THANKS TO OUR SPONSORS ================================== 👏Thanks Remi. Give your teeth a break without breaking the bank with Remiand save up to 50%. ➡︎ https://shopremi.com/PILLOW 👏 Thanks Cure. Get 20% off your first order. Stay hydrated and feel your best! ➡︎ https://curehydration.com/PILLOW Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices…

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플레이어 FM은 웹에서 고품질 팟캐스트를 검색하여 지금 바로 즐길 수 있도록 합니다. 최고의 팟캐스트 앱이며 Android, iPhone 및 웹에서도 작동합니다. 장치 간 구독 동기화를 위해 가입하세요.

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