Hi, I’m Alyssa Patmos soon-to-be Alyssa Kulesa and I’m endlessly curious about how to human. In a world that discourages talking about the taboo, I bought a microphone. As Mister Rogers said, “Anything human is mentionable and anything mentionable is manageable.” I invite you to join me as we journey through the mess, the magic, and the mania in between because what we can talk about we can manage. This honest conversation extravaganza includes free-flowing conversations and high doses of vu ...
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Tips to Nourish Yourself This Holiday Season with Laura Guilmain (Ep. 55)
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The holidays bring joy and laughter, but they can also bring stress and tension. Laura Guilmain joins me as co-host to share tips and tricks for staying grounded in your desires and nourishing yourself this holiday season. We cover: How to avoid overeating due to emotional stress How to set boundaries with family members How to shift the focus from…
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Swim below the surface of conscious thought with me today and explore the subconscious—that deeper layer that runs your thoughts, patterns, and actions unknowingly. This is episode 54 of Make it Mentionable and I’m rooting for your clarity. If you love the episode, please leave a review and subscribe. It helps get the word out and makes it easier f…
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When we’re clear, we can make decisions with ease. When we’re not, we end up spinning more than a record player. There’s one thing that will kill our clarity faster than a needle to a balloon—certainty. This is episode 53 of the Make it Mentionable Show and I’m rooting for your clarity. If this episode has you nodding your head every second, Prisma…
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What kind of relationship are you in? Are you sailing the high seas onboard a luxury cruise liner? Or are you barely staying afloat in an inflatable dinghy? In this week’s episode, we dive into the 5 types of relationships. What kind of relationship have you boarded? More importantly, what kind do you want? To get my relationship check-in mentioned…
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No one wants to feel like a doormat. So naturally, we employ strategies to protect ourselves from getting walked all over. Unfortunately, some of these strategies are less than stellar for actually resolving conflict. Getting defensive is one such strategy. The good news is, there’s a simple pivot you can make the next time you feel defensive that …
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Language Arts and the art of language are two totally different things. Most of us have taken a language arts class, but almost none of us were taught the true art of language. When you learn this art, it can be almost shocking how you can get so much more of what you want. This quick language pivot will make it easier for others to assist you in g…
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Many people walk around feeling “stuck” and have no idea why. But the truth is, it’s impossible to be stuck. Tune in to free yourself from feeling stuck forever. This is episode 49 of Make it Mentionable and I’m cheering for your momentum. The show notes and transcript for the episode are available here: https://alyssapatmos.com/show/episode-49 EXT…
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Do you have a problem or a perspective? When you ask yourself this one question, your problems start to dissolve like dark chocolate on your tongue. Tune in to shrink your problems (no hot water required). This is episode 48, and I’m rooting for your peace, joy, and creativity. The show notes and transcript for the episode are available here: https…
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We all have an inner child. Whether or not we pay attention to our inner children is an entirely different story. This is episode 47 of the Make it Mentionable show and I have a very simple and highly effective practice for you to start healing your inner child. I’m rooting for your healing, your full expression, and your inner peace. 💋🎙 The show n…
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Toxic Positivity: Pivot from the Dark Side of “Good Vibes Only”
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What is toxic positivity? How does toxic positivity hurt you and your relationships? In this episode of Make it Mentionable, I break down toxic positivity and give 3 steps for breaking it’s destructive cycle in conversations and relationships. Plus, whether you default to toxic positivity when you’re talking to yourself or someone else, I’ve got ph…
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Self-help can feel like a public bathroom. You know you have to go, but you don’t really want to use it. Change is easier when it elicits positive emotions like joy, pleasure, or hope. It’s harder when it elicits criticism, judgement, shame, and guilt. Self-help can quickly leave us feeling like there’s a laundry list of things to “fix” about ourse…
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Resilience is a life changer, shaper, and saver. In this episode, I’m dishing my top tip for how to become more resilient. All throughout I’m rooting for the expansive life. The kind of life where you bounce back from challenges quicker, and choose expansion over constriction. Pivoting to resilience will help you get there. The show notes and trans…
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This week I’m coming to you from my hotel room in Greece with 3 insights I’ve been reminded of for more presence. We can never reduce all the things that take us out of the present moment, so what do we do instead? These insights will help you reclaim more presence, whether you’re at home or traveling. The show notes and transcript for the episode …
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When You Want to Change Directions with Stephanie King
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Changing directions can feel daunting at times. It’s like one part of you knows you need something new, but another part may be freaking out at the thought of switching things up. In this episode, Stephanie King joins me to co-host a conversation about how to change directions—especially if it feels overwhelming. ABOUT STEPHANIE Stephanie King is a…
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Ever feel like there isn't enough time? This week I'm talking about the power of our attention. If we want to reclaim our time, we have to reclaim where our attention flows. Because if we aren’t intentional about our attention, everyone else is happy to claim it for themselves. Our attitudes, thoughts, and actions get an upgrade when we're consciou…
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Sometimes conflict in relationships feels like a tsunami, flooding our systems. Other times, it feels like the tide going in and out—inevitable, but gentle. In this episode, I’m riffing on 5 perspective shifts that transform triggering moments in relationships before they turn tsunami status. I’m cheering for less turmoil and more peace in your lif…
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Conflict gets a bad rap. When conflict is handled with care it can lead to greater intimacy time and time again. In this episode of Make it Mentionable, I’m sharing a new way to handle conflict so you can let go of emotional whiplash and experience more peace. The show notes and transcript for the episode are available here: https://alyssapatmos.co…
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I’m fascinated by the ways we can resolve conflict faster, navigate conversations with more elegance, and go from rupture to repair with less disruption. But how do we do all that? Behavioral flexibility. (Ability to do the splits not required). Tune in to hear: 💋🎙 Why you don’t need to be the smartest person in the room (and what to strive for ins…
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This week I’m diving into competition, comparison, and the courage to be yourself. Are you playing in a league of your own? Or are you playing in the muddy waters of someone else’s desires? Hit play for a conversation on: 💋🎙How comparison traps us in discontent and how to stop it 💋🎙The downsides of focusing on your competition 💋🎙Why knowing what we…
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If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed, this episode’s for you. What’s in store... 💋🎙 Discover the two critical factors that lead to overwhelm 💋🎙 The two questions you can ask yourself to stop overwhelm in its tracks 💋🎙 Why constraints are are the antidote to overwhelm 💋🎙 How to create constraints that expand instead of constrict Did this episode spark a …
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My houseplants are teaching me things again! This week we're talking about how to create space for growth. Hint: It doesn't require a complete overhaul of your life--just a bigger pot. Tune in to discover: 💋🎙 What mental houseplants are and how to tell if yours are ready for new pots 💋🎙 How our thoughts and beliefs lead us to stagnate or grow 💋🎙 Ho…
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Is Your Desire to Learn Turning You Into a Saturated Sponge?
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"You're like an information sponge!" You've likely heard this phrase if you're a self-identified lifelong learner like me. But sponges can only take in so much water before they start sloshing dirty water around instead of cleaning the counter. Similarly, we can only take in so much information before experiencing information overload. If you're hu…
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How we perceive a situation directly influences how we respond. But what or who determines your perception—you or your inner critic? Tune in to discover: 💋🎙 How to recognize your inner critics 💋🎙 Sneaky voices that may mean an inner critic stole the show 💋🎙 Why trying to banish inner critics doesn’t work and what to do instead So if you’ve ever... …
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Feel stuck but unsure what choice to make? Know something is off but not sure what you want instead? Tired of sitting on the fence between decisions? This episode is sure to have some gems in store for you because we’re talking about embracing a life of choice. Tune in to learn: 💋🎙 What a choice point is and how to use them to make your life easier…
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It’s a special birthday edition! I turn 31 this week, and it just so happens this is the 31st episode of the show. Naturally, that requires something fun! Geoff joins me on the couch for a special Ask Me session. Geoff compiled a list of questions people might ask kids, tweens, and teens on their birthday and asked me instead. I didn’t get to peek …
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Why Our Relationship With Food is Broken with Megan Brown
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Our food system is broken. As a result, our relationship with our bodies suffers. Health coach and functional health practitioner, Megan Brown, joins me to discuss our societal definition of aging, the role food plays in how we feel, and how we can nourish ourselves in a world filled with cluttered messages around health. EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS 💋🎙How f…
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I talk about perfectionism a lot because it's a sneaky little coping mechanism with more tentacles to grip us than an octopus 🐙 But today we're loosening that grip. In today's episode, I'm diving deeper into perfectionism and sharing two phrases you can adopt right away that have consistently helped me loosen the grip perfectionism once had in my l…
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This week’s episode is just you and me talking about joy. More specifically, we’re talking about trapped joy because I’ve found that sometimes joy is one of our most terrifying feelings. I break down what trapped joy is and how we can start experiencing more joy in our daily lives. You might be experiencing trapped joy if you’ve ever been on a date…
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OCD, Eating Disorders, and The Ways We Search for Control with Laura Morsman
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Laura was 14 when she found out she had 28 days left to live. Her body was deteriorating rapidly due to anorexia, and she needed help. The way Laura tells her story is incredibly powerful and sets the tone for a conversation that wanders through questions often left unspoken. We discuss eating disorders, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, the role cont…
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Rest, Relaxation, and What Trees Can Teach Us About Both with Emily Carter
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Emily Carter joins me to talk about rest, relaxation, time, and leisure. These topics often make for hot articles, but how often are they talked about through the lens of trees, bees, and nature? That's where we're going in today's episode. Often, the distortion we feel around our time leads to burnout or a general sense of unfulfillment. In this e…
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Below the Surface on Mental Health, Groupthink, and Religion with Dr. Mitch Harlan of Truth Talks
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It’s mash-up week at Make it Mentionable! When Dr. Mitch Harlan reached out to me to interview him on his show, Truth Talks, we decided to create an episode mash-up mixing the spirit of both shows together. The result was topic roulette in search of perspective, wisdom, and truth. As always, no topic is off-limits and we dive below the surface on m…
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45 Lessons From a 90-Year-Old (Part Two) with Alyssa + Geoff
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In last week’s episode, Geoff and I brought you along as we went through a list of 45 life lessons written by now 90-year-old Regina Brett. When we left off, we had 18 more to go. This is part two of Geoff and I diving into the wisdom of Regina’s list. Join us as we explore what each lesson means to us—what we love, what we’d edit, and how we’re in…
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45 Lessons From a 90-Year-Old (Part One) with Alyssa + Geoff
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When Regina Brett turned 90-years-old, she re-published one of the most popular columns she’d ever written—a list of 45 lessons life taught her. A few weeks ago, Geoff stumbled across this list, and we started talking about it over espresso martinis. We quickly realized we were having too much fun discussing it, so we decided to turn it into an epi…
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Hidden Fears and What to do About Them with Linda Ugelow
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Sharing your story and yourself with others can be terrifying at times. And I’m not just talking on stage. I can’t tell you how many times people come to me saying, “I feel like I lost my voice in the relationship.” Being under the spotlight whether it’s on stage or in a 1:1 conversation, can lead to full-blown panic. I’m talking you’re supposed to…
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What Does Fulfillment Actually Feel Like? with Julie Schoen
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We often think success and fulfillment go hand-in-hand. The general narrative seems to be if you have success you’ll experience fulfillment. But as many of us have learned, that isn’t always the case. Julie Schoen joins me for a deep dive into what fulfillment actually feels like. We discuss how to access more joy, what presence and fulfillment hav…
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How Do We Fix Our Broken Systems? with Chris Ward
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Chris Ward joins me to talk about fixing our broken systems. This convo is a tad different from ones I’ve released thus far and I’m super excited to share it with you. Chris tells me about his time spent in human intelligence collection and what his experience in the military taught him about systems. We then have a convo about how to have hope whe…
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Sami Miles joins me to talk about leaning into turning points and the nuances of making an unconventional choice. Highlights from the conversation: The turning point that led to Sami quitting her corporate career Another unconventional choice Sami and her now-husband made that also influences their kids (and how it’s made their lives better) Tips f…
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Experiencing Wonder, Awe, and Magic with Stormy Sweitzer
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How often do you find yourself wondering? Stormy Sweitzer joins me this week to talk about wonder and awe. We talk about the power of choosing where to put our attention, how wonder walks changed our lives, and give practical tools for cultivating more wonder in your life. And in case the benefits of wonder are feeling foreign to you, we share the …
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How Do We Flourish When Things Feel Complicated? With Dr. Sophia Town
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Dr. Sophia Town is on the show with me this week to talk about how we flourish in the face of complexity. We dive into what it means to flourish, how to cultivate wisdom, the power of discernment, how to make the transition from knowing to being, and what to do about our society's prioritization of the rational mind. We let one of Sophia's recent s…
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“Should It Be This Hard?” An Unconventional Q & A with Geoff and Alyssa
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Geoff and I are coming to you from our couch this week with an unconventional Q & A. We identify a question that many people end up being plagued with and offer stories and solutions for figuring out how to answer it. Come behind closed doors with us as we shine a light on the uncomfortable, so it holds less power. This week’s question is, “Should …
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Blind Spots, Bravery, and Unlocking our Truest Selves with Iona Holloway
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Iona Holloway is on the show with me this week for an illuminating conversation about shrinking, shadows, shame, and self-liberation. The first question we ask is, “Is inner work worth it?” Once we cover that, we dive into why women shrink and the many faces shrinking can have. We talk about safety, coping mechanisms, how to be on your own team, wh…
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How do Science & Spirituality Co-Exist? What Fire Teaches Us with Dr. Amber Ortega
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My friend Dr. Amber Ortega joins me to talk about science and spirituality. As a scientist, firefighter, and priestess, Amber brings a unique lens to exploring these two worlds that often seem at odds. We talk about the science of fire and why it’s been such a powerful symbol for humans throughout history. We also discuss what fire teaches us about…
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Full Time Travel, Dealing with Burnout, and Daring to Act on Your Dreams with Irina Leoni
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Irina Leoni joins me to talk about the nuances of what it means to travel full time. We dive into what it takes to own and act on your desires, how burn out can creep in even while traveling, the emotions traveling full time can bring up, and what to do if you decide you want to go all in on travel. Questions of loneliness come up in addition to a …
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Growing Up, Vulnerability, and How Our Parents Creep Into Our Relationships with Ron Cecil
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Ron Cecil joins me for a conversation about creating intentional relationships—the kind that add more vibrancy to our lives. I met Ron 2 minutes before hitting record, but by the end we feel like great friends. We ask and answer: If a marriage doesn’t work, is it a failure? When is vulnerability helpful? Is the patriarchy hurting men, too? What are…
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Working Through Conflict in Relationships with Alyssa + Geoff
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Ahh! I’m so excited because Geoff, aka my boyfriend (why isn’t there a word between boyfriend and husband?) is joining me this week! In our first-ever joint episode we’re discussing how to work through conflict in relationships. We share many behind-closed-doors moments of conflict we’ve been through and how we came out on the other side feeling mo…
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This week, Erika Lyremark joins me to talk about how we can eliminate decision fatigue. During our conversation, we cover how to make powerful decisions, the difference between a viewpoint and an opinion, why viewpoints make everything easier, and how to get more of what you want in life. We also each share the scoop on what it was like working wit…
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How Do We Talk About Money And Debt Without Feeling Embarrassed? With Britni Ross
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My friend Britni Ross joins me to talk about money, debt, and the stories we tell ourselves about our worth. We discuss the shame and embarrassment that so often comes with mentioning debt and how talking about money can drastically change friendships for the better. ABOUT BRITNI: Britni Ross is a Business & Financial Educator who uses behavioral f…
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How Do We Cultivate Community As Adults? With Mindy Jones
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How do we cultivate community as adults? This is the question Mindy Jones joins me to talk about in this week’s episode. During our conversation, Mindy and I talk about belonging, how to lead community with intention, some of the reasons we’re left feeling disconnected in today’s day and age, and how to be intentional about finding friends you want…
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The Impact of Our Homes on Our Happiness with Emily Majewski
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Emily Majewski joins me to talk about how our environments—the homes we live in and the buildings we work in—significantly influence our well-being. We cover how our environments can limit our self-growth, how buildings pollute our bodies, and how to change our chemical dialogue with our homes to promote endorphins. One of my favorite points of dis…
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When You Don’t Want to Support Someone Through Suffering with Dr. Colter Ray
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Helping each other out is a good thing, right? What happens when it doesn’t feel like such a good thing, though? What happens when someone in your family gets sick or a friend goes through a hard time, but you don’t want to help them? These are the types of questions my friend Dr. Colter Ray and I are making mentionable in this week’s episode. We a…
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