The Paradox of Time

Conversations with Cinthia

Human beings are locked in time while we live on the earth, and we used to know it. The sun went down, and people could no longer see to continue working, which meant they had to end the day’s work and rest. Time used to pace us, just as our bodies used to do. Now, however, we seem to be in a game against time. Our technology allows us to multitask at unprecedented levels. We move faster and are not even aware of the moments in which we exist. We regret the past, reliving what we cannot change, and we rush ahead into the future, planning and conquering moments that have not yet arrived -- and, when they do arrive, we are already in the next set of moments. Our minds can go places that our bodies cannot go, and our bodies are exhausted by struggling and being left behind. We watch each other dissociate, splitting ourselves and failing to be present where we are; this is hard on our psyches.

Time is a set condition, albeit one we fail to honor in the modern era. Time is on its own journey and has its own calling. It is bound by Something much bigger than we are. We are under the impression now that we manage and control time, but, in reality, we can only respect or disrespect it. We are arrogant to think that we can control time; this is a containment issue. It is tragic to die without having lived, but how can we take advantage of time when we do not respect it? Time is on our side, in a way; its existence means that we each have time. Would you find it easy to waste what you knew was yours, or would you capitalize on it? The existence of time gives each of us time to change, time to live, time to seek God, time to spend. God does not often tell us how much time we each have, but we only have so much. Time is like a Rubik’s cube; no matter how we work it, we never seem to be able to get it the way we really want it to be.

Learning to respect time involves learning to accept the past as something we cannot change. We must learn to forgive our parents and others who made mistakes that hurt us, and it often helps to recognize that most of them probably wanted to do well by us. The present can be changed, but the past has to be faced, healed, forgiven, accepted, etc.

There is a difference between living and existing. Learning to respect time means learning to appreciate the amazing fact that God uses us to reveal Himself. He may do it through our strengths or our weaknesses, but there is no greater purpose. He is a God of paradox, though not of moral contradictions. God can work through all or none of what we have. He is a God of relationship who deals well with the gray areas and the complications, despite His own perfection and faithfulness.

Cinthia discussed an article by Steve Bloom in which he pointed out that we often go through our days as if we had no power to change our lives for the better. Drifting through life can seem like less work, but it is quite lonely and, in the long-run, more difficult than using time well. Have you ever tried to dance with someone who will not dance? The difference between living and existing has a lot to do with how much control you have over your own life and from where you see that control coming. There is a difference between hoping and steering. We do not get to determine everything that comes our way, but we do get to decide whether we show up and how much control to give to different emotions, etc. Merely existing can involve staying in lives we dislike simply out of a lack of hope. Cinthia stated, “I would rather you mess up and have a story about how you messed up than to have no story.” Coveting others’ lives and blessings can also be a way of wasting our own time.

Time is always going the same way, and there will be a day when it stops. Time is something you own in a sense; it is your time. We can think of our days as tickets we spend. Are you learning the lessons that time is trying to teach you so that you can move on to the next lesson? The hallmark of a fool is that he never hears; he is so caught up in his own way of thinking that he repeats his own folly and just blames others. Each of us dies as a sole person.

Time is a gift from God, and using time wisely is a way of honoring the Giver. Do you love the gift more than the Giver? Do you want His blessings more than you want Him? What does God have to show you about time? What most tempts you to waste time? You cannot know how much time you have, but there is a limit. Time is a friend; it paces us, directs us, shows us the next steps. There will come a day when there is no time; we will be timeless. But right now you have today. Do the things that need to be done in time.