Lovelife 공개
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It wasn’t the serpent, it was Jealousy. That might not be the way the Bible tells it but more relationships have been ruined by jealousy than any other cause. It’s not fun on either side, being the jealous one or the one who is suspected of a wandering eye. Alvean and Doug discuss the ways in which you can avoid the bitter pill of jealousy, build t…
 
It’s oh so tempting and many try, but few succeed. Getting back together with an ex can be the right thing to do but there is a right way to go about it to ensure you don’t make the same mistakes that caused you to part in the first place. Alvean and Doug talk about the pros and the pitfalls, offering some sound advice about when you should and whe…
 
Everyone has a story about the vindictive ex. Maybe it happened to you or to a friend but it is one of the most difficult and unsettling experiences you are likely to go through in your romantic life. Alvean and Doug talk about how best to navigate this difficult and toxic situation–and how to avoid it in the first place by ensuring that if you par…
 
In this episode, Alvean and Doug talk about the power of empathy in a relationship. You must learn to love yourself first, and through that experience learn what it means to be a source of support, comfort, and counsel for those you love. Empathy cannot be faked, it must be felt and it is the key to building a trusting and empowering dynamic betwee…
 
Most of us have a protective instinct that we use to shield ourselves from being hurt. But too often those protective measures get in the way of genuine intimacy and deep abiding relationship. In this episode, Alvean and Doug talk about the power that can be harnessed by permitting oneself to be vulnerable, to lay bare the true self. As scary as th…
 
It is an age old question, why am I here–what is my reason for being? Humans have long sought the answers to life’s most challenging question: what really matters? Alvean and Doug tackle this thorny question with observations about the sources of happiness and contentment that mean and women have searched for their entire lives. You can find a full…
 
In this episode, Alvean and Doug continue on the theme of the past few weeks in their revelations about the wisdom that is often gained amidst very painful experiences. It has been said that life is a poor teacher because it administers tests and only then, the lesson. How we ensure that the lesson is learned, not repeated has a great deal to do wi…
 
Is it possible to lie to yourself? The answer, surprisingly, is yes. We do it all the time, hide what we know to be the truth because the truth is too painful, we are afraid of the consequences, or have repressed the feelings that led to our self deceit. Regardless of the reasons, these lies hurt us and can, if left un-challenged result in emotiona…
 
Ending any relationship is painful, regardless of whether it was your decision or your partner’s. Time is often the only way to heal but there are ways to move forward and restore the self-love that is necessary to any successful relationship in the future. Alvean and Doug talk from experience about how one begins that process. For a complete trans…
 
Following last week's episode on surviving infidelity, listeners asked if it is possible to prevent cheating? Alvean and Doug take on the question and offer some thoughts about the conditions that lead to cheating and the very real differences between serial behavior and a one time mistake. They also discuss the not so hidden clues that you should …
 
Perhaps the most difficult challenge, infidelity erodes trust the fundamental cornerstone of all healthy relationships. Moving past the act itself and learning to understand why it occurred and whether it is likely to happen again is critical to any hope of mending what has been broken between you. In this episode, Alvean and Doug discuss the under…
 
Let's face it, relationships aren't always easy--they require real effort, patience and understanding on the part of both parties. When differences in race, religion, politics or culture come into play they can be fraught with even greater challenges. Alvean and Doug discuss those challenges and ways in which couples can help ensure they make their…
 
Second or third marriages bring both the opportunity to find happiness in the wake of a divorce or widowhood but they can also pose some challenges especially when children are involved. Blending your two families requires patience, acceptance and sensitivity to how children process emotional attachment and sibling relationships. Alvean and Doug ta…
 
With apologies for the title, this post should say when one person in a relationship earns more than another, because as we know this issue is a common source of potential imbalance in a relationship that can lead to a number of issues. We do hear about a fragile male ego, but the truth is while that may have something to do with some couples' clas…
 
I just can't seem to find the right man; every woman I meet is ........; there are no good men left. Do these and similar statements seem familiar to you? If so, the problem may not be with the universe but with you. Alvean and Doug discuss the ways we may be sabotaging our dating life, creating unreasonable expectations , seeking impossible perfec…
 
Let's face it, breaking up, as the song says, is hard to do. Unless you are callous or exiting a toxic relationship no one wants to consciously hurt another person. There are ways to help a former lover to gain appropriate closure and free them and yourself to move on. It still hurts, but these approaches which Alvean and Doug discuss are not only …
 
Is there such a thing as a soulmate? Are we destined to find our true love, a match made literally in heaven? Alvean and Doug explore these beliefs and the truths behind real and lasting relationships. You'll be surprised. Learn about couples who have life long commitment, who pass from this life within minutes of one another, who seem to defy the …
 
She is suddenly cool and aloof. When you ask what's wrong she says nothing but you know that isn't the case. That is passive aggressive behavior. He agrees to do something together but sulks all day--passive aggressive behavior is at work. Alvean and Doug discuss how to recognize and deal with a partner when they are consciously or unconsciously di…
 
Jokingly it has been said that parenthood is the last of the unskilled occupations. There is some truth to this. How we learn to parent has a great deal to do with how we were parented and that may be for the good or bad. Parenting requires abundant patience, compassion and listening skills as well as some good model. Find out more in this episode …
 
For many people, social media is where they play out their relationship dynamics. It is not usually a healthy outlet for what should remain a private and personal expression of feelings. Alvaen and Doug discuss the dangers and pitfalls of social media and how it can be come a corrosive element--the third party in a relationship of two. For a comple…
 
It's a big step and one that is fraught with tests of your relationship. Habits that may be endearing in small does can become irritating when they occur all the time--differences in needs and desires--ranging from simple things like personal habits, the need for entertainment or solitude, even what you want to eat or when to go to sleep can become…
 
How we show our love has everything to do with the love languages we speak. For some, the giving of gifts or time is their way of expressing love. For others it is romantic gestures or physical closeness. Learn what you love language is and how you and your partner can learn to recognize each other's expressions of love even and especially when the…
 
We are told that we'll know our ideal mate when we first meet them, but that is as often as not really what happens. The deep bonds and lasting commitment between two people takes time and nurture to reach fulfillment . The thunderclap of instant love is too often a chemical or romantic impulse . How do you learn to tell the difference and more imp…
 
It has been said that great relationships begin with great friendships. Whether those friendships advance to something more romantic or not--learning what it means to be a good friend is an important life lesson. Alvean and Doug discuss the hallmarks of friendship and how reciprocity and selflessness are characteristic of the committed partners. Fo…
 
Alvean and Doug talk about what makes for true intimacy in a relationship. For many people intimacy is code language for sex, but this is a very one dimensional view of something that encompasses a range of emotions and connections between people that can be entirely platonic or ragingly passionate. For more about this episode a full transcript can…
 
Is there such a thing as true love? How do we recognize it and what are the lessons we can take from couples that have been so fortunate as to find someone they are committed to for life? Alvean and Doug discuss these and other questions about the nature of love and commitment in this episode. For a full transcript, click here:LL59-What has true lo…
 
Is there a 'use by' date for marriage? Do relationships sour if they fail to move to a next level? These and other views about how love and bonding work are the topic of this episode as Doug & Alvean discuss how couples can take a long view of the ever changing ever evolving nature of their commitment to one another. For more about this episode and…
 
Living in the past is an unhealthy and potentially destructive behavior. We all have regrets at some point in our lives but no amount of emotional investment can change what has occurred. Alvean and Doug discuss strategies for learning from our past experiences while avoiding the pitfalls of allowing our regrets to rob of us our happiness in the pr…
 
Raising children together can be one of the most rewarding things a couple can do but at times also the most challenging. The challenges can be even greater when the children are not your own. Alvean and Doug talk about emotional bonds that father and mothers have with their children and children of another partner and how you can cope with co-pare…
 
As we move though our lives our perspectives and emotional response to others and to life situations change--sometimes for the better and sometimes the worse. Alvean and Doug talk about how these changes affect us and how we can recognize their impact on our emotional health. For a complete transcript, click here: LL55-How has your perspective chan…
 
Torn between two lovers is more than a song title--it is sometimes a reality and can lead to devastating consequences for everyone involved in a relationship triangle. In this episode Alvean and Doug discuss the challenges and chart a course to navigate the emotional seas. For a full transcript of this episode, click here:LL54-You, Me and .........…
 
There are times when Men and Women can be opaque to one another--prompting a good deal of misunderstanding and emotional trial. In this episode, Doug & Alvean explore the real feelings behind things men do say and don't. Getting in touch with one's feelings--expressing them to others is not a given and for men in particular an experience for which …
 
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