179. Hope & Healing After a Stillbirth (30 weeks) with Tori Underwood

The Joyful Mourning - A Podcast for Women Who Have Experienced Pregnancy or Infant Loss

This week on the podcast I am interviewing Tori Underwood. A mama to a precious daughter in heaven. Listen in as she shares her story of losing her daughter at 30 weeks with no real answers as to why – I know many of you will be able to relate to her story of being an invisible mother.

We discuss what it was like for Tori to pursue answers and solutions from her medical team to hopefully prevent a similar loss in the future, specifically as it related to her having a uterine septum. Tori shares with me the challenges she faced in taking care of herself after her daughter died, feeling like her body had failed her and made even the simplest things like eating feel impossible. She shares how she navigated that challenge and gives practical advice for anyone who may be facing a similar challenge.

We talk about how she has found healing, the role that therapy and specifically emdr therapy has had in that healing process and why it was important to her to finish her daughter’s nursery even though she would never use it. Tori shares with me what it looks like to mother her daughter in heaven, the practical, simple and beautiful ways she honors and remembers her today.

No matter what your story of loss is – Tori’s story, how she has found healing and the wisdom she has gained in this season will remind you that you are not alone.

QUESTIONS WE DISCUSS IN NO. 179

1. What surprised you most about loss and the grief journey?
2. What has been the most challenging aspect of this journey?
3. What has been helpful to you as you navigated those challenges?
4. What has healing looked like for you in this season?
5. You said to me: “I felt like I was drowning and like I should start only preparing for bad things to happen to me.” What would you say to another mom who is feeling similarly?
6. What are practical ways you mother your daughter in heaven?
7. How do you answer the question: How many children do you have? Or Do you have any children?
8. What do you wish others knew and understood about loss, grief and finding healing?

FREE GIFT | THE BIRTHDAY PROJECT Every October in honor of my son’s birthday and Pregnancy & Infant Loss Awareness month I gift grieving moms with a tangible reminder that they are loved, their baby(s) are loved and that they not forgotten. To learn more about this special project and to send yourself or someone you love an AadenSage Birthday Project Art Print just for the cost of shipping, head to themorning.com/birthdayproject

Check out our meaningful and beautiful collection of art prints by heading to themorning.com/shop.

FREE ONLINE SUPPORT COMMUNITYA place away from social media where you can find support and care from women who are just like you. Women navigating the day to day ups and downs of grief. A place where you can feel not alone in this. Come join us by heading to themorning.com/community

FREE LIVE EVENT | OCTOBER 16 AT 8PM EST.Join us for a free live event: a Night of Remembrance. A night to honor your baby(s). You can find the details and registration information for this event at themorning.com/remembrancenight.

FREE GUIDE: IF YOU LOVE A GRIEVING MOMAnd if you love a grieving mom, we have something for you too, a free guide with simple tips for how to love a grieving friend, head to themorning.com/friendsandfamily.