Sober Black Girls with Khadi A. Oluwatoyin

Sober Curious

My guest today is Khadi A. Oluwatoyin, who is the founder of Sober Black Girls Club – a platform for Black women and non-binary people who are sober, sober curious, or even just thinking about putting down the bottle.

Khadi was raised in a strict Muslim household, and alcohol was not part of her world growing up. But within hours of arriving at college, she had her first drink – and so began her career as a heavy binge drinker. She shares the specific solution that alcohol provided for her: it was a way to put down the high-achieving, perfectionist tendencies that she developed as a kid to mask the impact of her abusive childhood.

As well as hearing her personal story, I wanted to learn from Khadi about the specific challenges of Black women in sobriety – and we get into topics such as the myth of the Black superwoman, and why AA tends to be so white, and why creating more inclusive sober spaces is not always the answer. In the episode we discuss:

-Becoming a high achiever in school to mask the impact of her traumatic childhood

-The immediate relief she felt on taking her first drink at college

-Perusing a career in law – and what makes this a heavy-drinking profession

-Why early intervention can prevent people from developing more serious substance use disorders

-Why alcohol addiction is often not spoken about openly among the Black community

-Being the only Black person at the rehab facility she went to, and why this is so common

-Why it takes so long for high functioning addicts to get the help they need

-Her experience of AA – and why she knew this program would never work for her

-Why it was having no more goals to reach for that tipped her into addiction

-Mental health conversations in the black community

-Why Black women’s self-worth is so tied up with being busy and helping others

-Why race is integral to both the causes of and recovery from addiction

-What’s in her Sober Black Girls recovery toolkit – and why creating SBG has been part of this

Learn more about Khadi and her work HERE and follow her on Instagram @soberblackgirlsclub

And big thanks to Lyres and Three Spirit for partnering on this episode!

Discover Lyres non-alcoholic spirits at Lyres.com and visit lyres.com/sobercurious to sign up for a special 15% discount code. You can also follow along on Instagram and find more recipes @lyresspiritco.

OrderThree Spirit botanical elixirs at Threespiritdrinks.com and get 15% off your online order with the code RUBY. Find them on IG @threespiritdrinks