49: PARENT AND CHILD RELATIONSHIP - TWO WAY COMMUNICATIONS (EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATIONS)

SHE'S CONFIDENT WITH DEON TEH

TRANSCRIPT FOR EP49:

Welcome to SHE is Confident. Hi! This is Deon Teh and in this episode, I will be sharing with you about EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATIONS.

In this Modern world, many of us will have limited patience to listen to others, therefore our communication often breaks down regardless of any area, especially in family or work that might cause unnecessary suffering to each other.

We receive overwhelming information daily due to the advanced technology, therefore there is a lot of influence that makes us react daily, furthermore, if we carry our own emotions, we will easily burn out and do something that is beyond our inner desire.

Effective communication is another way to improve our relationship with the outside world but it is important that we start with our relationship with ourselves first once we can balance ourselves, we will have the right concept of communication which will improve your communication.

Just like every child, my son also loves to play video games, and each time my son and I will have many arguments. For example, certain video games could have inappropriate content according to my standards, I would not want him to play but he thinks it is ok.

As a mother, I have many negative thoughts over his video playing. To stop him from playing excessively, we Initially limit the days that he can play.

However, when he does something he likes and will contribute to his knowledge or skills, I will show my encouragement and support to him. For instance, he loves watching youtube videos to learn painting skills. Sometimes I will join him too. I remembered once we had a nice conversation on a particular and the paint colour that the instructor used in the video to do a painting of the northern lights. I learnt a colour concept which I previously did not really pay attention to, and we had a good heart to heart discussion.

In my company, for every order we receive, we will need to draft the drawing of the product in our system to make the final fabrication of the product. Once, there was an order where the customer was unable to understand the 2D drawings of his order even after my staff spent 8-9 hours drafting it

After getting feedback from the customer, my staff insisted that there is no way to change the system to suit the customer requirements.

Both sides did not want to change or compromise. I stepped in and communicated with both sides to find a solution to the problem. After mutual communication with them, I managed to get a solution that can help customers as well as save my staff’s time instead of redrafting the order.

This is another kind of my curiosity towards things that happened and I chose to react positively and communicate well.

Treat our child as our friend, let him feel your love is without conditions, no matter how I will not threaten to take away his necessity or reward him to stop playing, I will take an opportunity to play with him and try to understand what game he is playing. I will try to talk to him reasonably and from time to time he knows what we think and we can discuss the things he does in a calm and positive manner.

In work, I realise that effective communication is not just one-way communication.

No matter how good the communicator is, it will also depend on what kind of person that I am dealing with, a negative or positive person. how would you persist in this situation if the person is negative and how to find out the gap in between and be getting closer to getting a compromise.

I am willing to listen to them and they also, in turn, be willing to listen to me, they are not just robots that do without thinking and at the same time, I keep learning in areas that I am not familiar with and surprisingly I learn a lot from them, like some that are not in my area or that area that I didn’t pay attention before which can improve overall.

I found that no matter it is my Son, my husband, my staff as well as myself, we all have inner awareness that arises from this effective communication,

By having effective communication, we no longer need to nag and we can see improvement in all of us.

If we remain humble in whatever status we are in, we will see things from a different perspective and in the end, we will benefit from this effective communication.

We should use positive and curious feedback instead of criticism that might improve things but will hurt each other's relationship and test each other 's limits too.

Conclusions

I remember this saying: What can you achieve if you win the world but lose the support from the people around you. We live in a world where we are connected to each other, there is no way that we can live by ourselves, and everyone in this world depends on each other, therefore effective communication will make you a better self.

Compassion comes from understanding, for the majority of us, we see things on the surface and jump into conclusions too fast, and we are carrying too many worries and fear within us, and what we actually need is to be mindfulness ourselves and when we have stability and peace.

If you want to talk about transforming your inner child, healing your relationships with yourself and money, connect with me through my Facebook and the link is in the show notes.

I look forward to seeing you in my next episode where I will be sharing with you about TURN WORRIES INTO BLESSINGS.

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