Amy Chan | The Secret Ingredients to a Healthy Relationship & Surviving a Breakup

The Art of Charm

In today’s episode, we cover overcoming breakups with Amy Chan. Amy has been writing about relationships, dating, and love for over a decade, is the Editor-in-Chief of Heart Hackers Club, and is the author of Breakup Bootcamp – The Science of Rewiring Your Heart.

The end of a relationship can be a traumatic experience for many but it doesn’t have to break you - so what can you do to bounce back as an even better version of yourself, how can you learn from the relationship, and what resources can you rely on to help you move on?

What to Listen For

• How Amy Chan Became a Relationship Expert - 0:21

• Breakup Bounce Back and Attachment Theory - 2:19

• What can you do to focus on yourself and heal after a breakup rather than blame the ex and other external factors?
• What is Attachment Theory and how does it teach us to view love as we grow up?
• What are the 3 main types of attachment that we learn during our childhood and how do they influence our view of love in adulthood?
• Once you know what your style of attachment is, what can you do to prevent yourself from sabotaging future relationships?
• How do you set healthy boundaries with friends and family after a breakup if they’re constantly trying to give you advice and project their own issues on you?

• Learning From the Past for Future Relationships - 21:00
• What exercises can you use to recognize red flags with new potential partners if you have a tendency to jump from one relationship to another?
• How do you identify the baggage that YOU bring into relationships so you don’t let it destroy your relationships?
• What journaling prompts can you use to heal after a breakup?
• Why is breaking up from a relationship similar to breaking an addiction and what can you do to make it as brief and painless as possible?
• Why are rituals important to recovering normalcy after a breakup and what rituals can you start using today?
• How can we make the right choice when we are overwhelmed by dating options in front of us so we don’t waste our time?
• What are the 3 secret ingredients in a healthy relationship foundation?

• What is the Breakup Bootcamp - 44:06
• What goes on during Amy Chan’s Breakup Bootcamp?
• What is limerence and how does it keep us in a vicious cycle of hurt?
• What is the biggest myth about how men and women handle breakups?

The end of a relationship can feel like losing a loved one because your significant other feels like a part of your identity and your future. Losing that part of you, and feeling like a part of your future is ripped out from under you can be a difficult event to recover from, but there are steps you can take to minimize the suffering and move forward as a better stronger version of yourself.

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Resources from this Episode

Amy Chan on Twitter

Breakup Bootcamp

Breakup Bootcamp: The Science of Rewiring Your Heart by Amy Chan

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

AJ on Instagram

Johnny on Instagram

The Art of Charm on Instagram

The Art of Charm on YouTube

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