EP 66 - How To Keep Them Rushing Home For More

Relationship Fitness Podcast

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Your Relationship Warrior coach, 💪😎

Tom

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Transcripts Below 👇👇👇

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Transcripts Below 👇👇👇

(00:01):

Hey here with you tonight and bringing you tips, wisdom, (That's a loud motorcycle out there) tips, wisdom lessons learned about relationships, not only from my own failures and successes but also from, more importantly, those who, people who have great relationships for 20, 30 plus years and oh, allergies. Uh, and just sharing that with you so that maybe you get that one little thing, that one little thing that can help you improve your relationship. All right.

(00:32):

So I was having a thought, I was like, I was reading this story about this person was talking about how they kept their spouse, I think it was, kept their husband rushing home several times a week. And it was, you know, so I got this title here, right? About how to keep them coming, no rushing home several times a week. And some ways you can do that. You just got to find out what makes them tick, you know, give them a reason to come home, give them a reason to want to be there versus ah...I'll get home later, I'm gonna work late.

(01:15):

Wow. Sheila is looking good tonight. Maybe we'll go to happy hour tonight versus going home. And that's just kind of crazy, right? But give them reasons to come home, not to versus staying away because they don't want to come home to a nagging spouse. And this person that I was reading this article about, talked about how they found out what drove, worked, was curious about, worked to figure out what drove them crazy in the bedroom, and would occasionally text them maybe a flirty picture. You know, those kinds of things, we're not talking about sexting here, but kind of a little message about, Hey, when you get home tonight. Guess what?... You know, maybe it's once a week. I don't know something like that, but how do you get there? How do you get to the point where you understand what really just floats their boat? Drives them crazy?

(02:11):

Just make some like, oh man, I've got to keep her here right over and over again. I'm not going anywhere else because I got that waiting for me at home because I got it good! I don't need to go anywhere else. It may not be every time, but it's enough that, oh yeah!!! So how do you figure that out? Well, there's a couple of ways you can figure that out and it all involves talking with each other, but how? So you can sit at the dinner table and go, Hey, you know, I like this. I don't like that, but how much better would it be if you two are in the bedroom and if you're not really comfortable, about doing it with the lights on, you could do it with the lights off and just kind of talk to each other through, take turns every other time, "Hey, I'm going to start out and you can, you know, we'll do me first and then we'll do you..." No pun intended there, but just kind of guide them through it's like, "Hey, here's what I really like, but here's how you can improve that."

(03:12):

And you got to let your ego go here. You may think that your, uh, I'm gonna get a little risque here, your oral sex skills, or just phenomenal, but "Honey, a little less teeth, a little more lips." Or "Honey, put your tongue here not there." kind of a thing. I know that's kind of crazy, but you know, sex is a big part of relationships, and being successful at it is great. And if you're going to want to understand how to really satisfy your partner and keep them coming back time after time and valuing what they've got at home, part of it is understanding what makes them tick in the bedroom and how do you do that? But by putting your ego aside and taking some criticism or constructive criticism or some coaching guiding and how they want you to do what they like, what you're doing a little better.

(04:09):

So, uh, is it getting hot in here? So anyway, um, kind of just, "Hey honey, you know, I like, we're in the dark" right? "I like this just shifted a little bit, a little less here and switch it up a little bit this way. And wow, that really works for me." And you want to know these things. You want this kind of feedback. And I talked about the other night, if you want to 10X, your relationship or even hundred X, your relationship, you want to get this kind of feedback. You want to put your ego aside. I mean, we're not in first grade anymore, right? We're not in grade school. We can take some reflection. We can take some feedback. And there's a reason, you know, I was listening to Jim Rohn again today and got so many great things. There's like, you know, there's a reason they make first-grade desks so small because when you're 25, we don't want you back in first grade.

(05:01):

No! We don't want you back in first-grade mentality and relationship and drama like, "Oh, you hurt my feelings. You told me I wasn't doing something right." Grow up! Anyway... So do that, do that little tip, get in the bedroom, lights on lights off. "Here's where I like it." "Here's where I don't like it." "This is why." Talk about your successes, your not-so successes in the bedroom. And it's not, you know, there's a "Hey I don't like that." Explain why "Because it's painful! I don't like it!" Or because it is just like, ugh! "I know you like doing it, honey, but to me, it's just like fingernails on the chalkboard. But instead here's what I really do like continue to do that" Gotta mix it up. You can't just do the same thing over and over again. Cause they like it. You gotta have a couple of things, right?

(05:52):

So you got to tell them a few things that you like and several things that you like. I mean, just be upfront and honest. And the more you can do that, set your ego to the side, accept the feedback and understand that it's about, you know, you're out here, but you're coming in here and being one, right? And learning to be one and be closer and have that core connection that is just unbreakable. Oh wow! Right? So with that hope, that serves you hope that helps just maybe give you that one little tip to just improve things and a vital part of a relationship, which is in the bedroom and making love having sex. But if you think this can help anybody, let's spread the word because it's all about building relationship fitness so we can spread and leave a better relationship legacy in order to do that, you have to learn how to be loving kind patient generous, and learn how to love the one you're with.

(06:55):

And that's what this video series is all about is simple tips. I was about to say ticks but that's in the south on a coon-dog, simple tips, tricks, wisdom lessons learned to help people to just have the one little tip that helps you like, wow, okay, I'm going to do that. So leave a comment below, let me know what you think. Let me know your lessons learned in the bedroom, keep it PG. And uh, you know, other tips that you may have to help other people in their relationships too. Let's hope. I mean, it's not just your relationship legacy we're working on here or mine. It's changing one relationship at a time and change the world, right, to save the world.