Respectful Parenting 공개
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In the 25+ years that Janet Lansbury has worked with children and parents, she's learned a lot. She's here to share it with you. Each episode of Unruffled addresses a reader's parenting issue through the lens of Janet's respectful parenting philosophy, consistently offering a perspective shift that ultimately frees parents of the need for scripts, strategies, tricks, and tactics. Janet is a parenting author and consultant whose website (JanetLansbury.com) is visited by millions of readers an ...
 
Parenting: It’s the hardest job we’ll ever do. Most of us are tired, stressed, struggling through meltdowns, and counting the minutes until bedtime. But what if raising kids could feel just a little lighter? What if you could end even the hardest day feeling good about how you’re parenting? I’m Dr. Hilary Mandzik – a licensed psychologist and mama of 3 changing the way we do parenting, so there’s less stress and more joy, even in the hardest moments! Join me each week on the Raised Resilient ...
 
Jen Lumanlan always thought infancy would be the hardest part of parenting. Now she has a toddler and finds a whole new set of tools are needed, there are hundreds of books to read, and academic research to uncover that would otherwise never see the light of day. Join her on her journey to get a Masters in Psychology focusing on Child Development, as she researches topics of interest to parents of toddlers and preschoolers from all angles, and suggests tools parents can use to help kids thri ...
 
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show series
 
Every once in a while a blog post about ‘childism’ makes the rounds on social media, which is described as being a “prejudice against young people” that’s on par with sexism, racism, and homophobia. But the Director of the Childism Institute, Dr. John Wall, argues that that definition implies children are simply victims of whatever adults throw at …
 
Navigating children’s meltdowns is one of the hardest parts of parenting. We often wonder: Is it normal for my child to have meltdowns? Why is my child having a meltdown? What in the world am I supposed to do during my child’s meltdowns? And why is it so hard to stay calm during my child’s meltdowns? In this week’s episode, I answer all of these qu…
 
It can be so hard to separate from our children sometimes! Particularly if they cry, seem anxious, or strongly object. How can we prepare our children (and ourselves) for a successful transition? Janet responds to emails from two different families struggling with goodbyes at school drop-off and offers recommendations for a helpful and respectful a…
 
Parental preference is really challenging; it’s so hard when your child only wants mommy or only wants daddy. Either you can’t get a break because your child seems to need you constantly, or you feel rejected because your child seems to want nothing to do with you. In this week’s episode, I answer a listener who asks: Why does my toddler only want …
 
The practice of acknowledging our children's feelings and struggles can provide healing, calming messages of safety and acceptance. With a genuine tone and a few words, our acknowledgments can help children share pent-up emotions, feel seen and heard, and gradually regulate, which in turn eases problematic behaviors. However, parents commonly share…
 
This episode builds on our conversation with Dr. Atle Dyregrov on the topic of talking with children about death, where we focused mainly on death as a general concept and navigating the first few days after the death. Grief therapist Katie Lear has a new book called A Parent's Guide to Managing Childhood Grief and focuses on the much longer period…
 
One of your most important jobs as a parent is helping your child make sense of the world around them; children are born knowing nothing about the world that surrounds them, and we slowly help them understand what’s happening and where they fit. In this week’s episode, I share why storytelling is SO powerful and how to use it to support your child’…
 
The mother of two boys feels they are constantly testing her limits and always at her side demanding attention. They won’t allow her a moment to handle daily chores like laundry or cooking, never mind her personal needs. “They think it’s funny, “ she writes, “and I undoubtedly lose my patience. I feel like they just don’t listen to whatever limit I…
 
Sometimes our kids go through phases – days, weeks, or even months – where they seem to need to be near us constantly. This can be challenging for us as parents; it’s hard to show up the way we want to when we’re struggling to get our own needs met because we’re constantly tending to our kids. In this week’s episode, I unpack what’s really happenin…
 
Janet shares an exchange she had with a parent who wonders how anyone can possibly live up to the extreme idealism of "gentle parenting." She writes: “It sounds so lovely… but it’s also crushing to never be able to live up to despite having all the tools and knowledge.” While "gentle parenting" is not a term Janet uses, she understands that it's a …
 
We've covered a number of episodes in the past that feed into this one, including Raising Emotionally Healthy Boys with Dr. Judy Chu (which focused on boys' understanding of masculinity in the preschool years), and Playing to Win with Dr. Hilary Levy Friedman (which looked at the lessons children learn from sports...which aren't really related to t…
 
You sit down to eat dinner after a long, exhausting day. You’re ready to enjoy your meal and chat with your partner … when your child interrupts with something they have to say right now. And then a few minutes later, your partner is telling a story … when your child interrupts again. In this week’s episode, I answer a listener who asks: Why do kid…
 
We all aspire for our children to grow up with a positive self-image and an abundance of self-confidence. When life throws our child a dilemma, it’s our natural instinct to want to fix it, or at least work them through the uncomfortable feelings with a pep talk. In this episode, Janet answers questions from three listeners and offers a more helpful…
 
If your kids are constantly fighting, you’re not alone. It can be SO challenging to know how to respond to constant arguments, teasing, and physical conflict. You might start to wonder: Is it normal for siblings to fight this much? How can I stop my kids from fighting? If you’re wondering these things, you’re not alone; it can be SO hard to see you…
 
A mother writes that her toddler son “can’t keep his hands off” his 10-month old sister. She describes his demeanor as a mixture of excitement and affection, but she also senses an undertone of aggression. She wants them both to feel her support when they’re together in one space, but she finds herself either holding him back or removing the baby a…
 
There are lots of books available now on how to talk with children about issues related to race, but Sarah W. Jaffe noticed a gap: there weren't any books geared toward non-academic audiences talking about how the choices that predominantly well-off, predominantly White parents make impact other people. From childcare choices to school to college, …
 
How many times a day do you hear: “Mommy, come play with me!”? You might be in the middle of putting the dishes away or working or just (finally!) having a moment to yourself … and then this request pulls at your heartstrings – and you either say yes begrudgingly or say no with heaps of guilt. But what if I told you that there was another option? I…
 
Early childhood expert Kisha Reid joins Janet in a lively conversation about the often overlooked and underestimated benefits of play-driven learning and how we can nurture these lifelong gifts for our children. Kisha and Janet discuss the magic of trusting children to discover and develop their passions and how our fears, misperceptions, and impat…
 
Screens are everywhere in 2022, and kids love them – but parents often use them with reluctance, guilt & anxiety. Maybe you can relate: Have you ever felt bad about using screens with your child? Have you Googled: “How does screen time affect kids?” or “Are screens safe for toddlers?” or “How much screen time is too much?” or “Why does my child mel…
 
Janet shares an exchange with a mom requesting "alternatives to time out when natural consequences aren’t appropriate." The parent wonders how to intervene with her toddler when she is possessive and aggressive around other kids.For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-selling books on Audible, FREE with a 30-day tr…
 
I've been wanting to do this episode for a loooong time. We covered episodes a long time ago on how children form social groups, and what happens when they exclude each other from play, but I wanted to do an episode exploring this issue related to slightly older girls, and from a cultural perspective. There are a lot of books and articles out there…
 
If your child’s on summer break, you’re probably already hearing the dreaded “I’m bored!”. When our kids beg us to entertain them, we can feel pulled to come up with an endless stream of ideas & activities, which is exhausting. But here’s the thing: entertainment is not what your child actually needs when they’re feeling bored. In this week’s episo…
 
The mother of a four-year-old is frustrated that her child will never say “I’m sorry" when he's done something wrong. She has tried both gentle and more forceful approaches, as well as attempting to help him understand the spirit and intent of an apology, all to no effect.For more advice on common parenting issues, please check out Janet's best-sel…
 
Our children's repeated behaviors can be baffling, exhausting, and sometimes infuriating, particularly after we've tried everything we can think of to make them stop. What are we missing? In this episode of ‘Unruffled’, Janet shares some of the common reasons behaviors persist and offers her actionable suggestions for helping our children (and ours…
 
We all want our kids to LISTEN, right? We want them to clean up their toys, get their shoes on when it’s time to go, and stop teasing their siblings when we ask them to. If you’re feeling this, you’re not alone; I get asked allllll the time “How do I get my child to listen?!” In this week’s episode, I talk about the mindset shift required to get ki…
 
I read a lot of textbooks on parenting for my Master's in Psychology (Child Development), I've read tens of thousands of peer-reviewed papers on the topic, and part of the reason it's hard work is that you can't ever take things at face value. In her now classic book Deconstructing Developmental Psychology, Dr. Erica Burman explodes a number of our…
 
You’re at the store, and a kind stranger says hi … but your child freezes & says nothing. You take your child to the playground, but he won’t leave your side. What should you do when your child acts shy? And does it mean something’s wrong? In this week’s episode, I share why I don’t think it’s helpful to call our kids shy. I’ll help you reframe how…
 
In the aftermath of the school shooting at Robb Elementary in Uvalde, TX yesterday, we're all grieving. We're heartbroken & outraged at the same time. And in the midst of all of these feelings, how do we support our kids? In this bonus episode, I talk about how to take care of our kids (and ourselves!) in the wake of a tragedy. I break down the imp…
 
It can be so tough to know how to support our kids when they’re feeling anxious. Sometimes we can start to feel anxious about their anxiety, and this can lead to everyone feeling even more anxious. In this week’s episode, I answer a question from a listener whose 11-year-old daughter is struggling with anxiety about riding in the car. I explore why…
 
How does respectful care work when we have more than one child? What can we do when siblings, multiples, and other groups of children seem to need our attention all at once? Janet's guest is early childhood specialist Erica Orosco Cruz, a mother of 4 and the founder/director of Homeschool Garden, a childcare center and preschool/kindergarten for ch…
 
For the first time, in this episode I bow out and and let listeners Jenny and Emma take over, who wanted to share how they’ve been supporting each other over the last few months. They started from pretty different points: Emma wasn’t having parenting struggles, but often over-communicated with her husband and he would stonewall in response, agreein…
 
As parents, we all want to help our kids build frustration tolerance. It can be so tough – for us and for them! – when our kids shut down before they even give something a chance. But sometimes the things we do to try to help our children tolerate frustration better only make things harder. (Frustrating, right?) In this week’s episode, I share why …
 
Adrianna and Tim had read all the parenting books. (And I mean ALL the books.) But NOTHING seemed to be working. They were still feeling frustrated with their kids on a very regular basis. And their kids were fighting what seemed like every second of the day. They joined the Parenting Membership last May, and the transformation our community has se…
 
Janet discusses the challenges and benefits of authenticity -- how being real with our children helps us to achieve our goals as parents, strengthens our relationship, and even makes our lives easier. Janet says that it was Magda Gerber who modeled authenticity for her, and her teachings “freed me to embrace my authentic, messy inner life and my me…
 
If we want to help our children develop emotion regulation, allowing them to express their feelings is key. But what do you do when you have to be somewhere, but your child is having a tantrum? Or what about when you have multiple kids who all need you at once – like when your toddler is crying, but your baby needs a diaper change? How do you meet …
 
Dealing with hitting, kicking, biting, pushing, scratching, spitting, and other aggressive behaviors in our children is one of the hardest parts of parenting. If you struggle in these moments, you’re so not alone! Aggressive behaviors during tantrums and meltdowns can be SO triggering and tricky. In this week’s episode, I dive into why these aggres…
 
Recently someone posted a question in one of my communities: “Is it really so wrong to want my child to just LISTEN to me sometimes? It seems like such a no-no in gentle parenting circles, and I’m worried that my child is growing up to be entitled and won’t know how to respect authority when they really HAVE to.” Parent Chrystal gave such a beautif…
 
Janet’s guest is the world-renowned nutritionist, family therapist, and author Ellyn Satter. Throughout her long career, Ellyn has successfully addressed issues related to eating and feeding and taught parents how to transform meals into happy, healthful, struggle-free events. “There is so much interference with sensible feeding,” Ellyn says. Her w…
 
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