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The Profitable Franchisees podcast is here to help you to run your franchise business with less stress, more flexibility in your time and of course make profit! Practical and helpful to give you the confidence and the tools and knowledge to have a profitable and successful franchise business.
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Ho Ho Ho! Or should I say Ho Ho Home Alone? I've already said it, it's too late to take it back. I might even say it again. Ho Ho Home Alone. It's December and Christmas is looming over us all. Have you bought your presents? Have you left any of your children home alone? We're doing the Home Alone franchise. Get ready for family friendly extreme vi…
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Midley Scott, Didley Squat, call him what you want. But the important thing is that he's still out there delivering consistent 2-3 star bores. And that means something. Show him so goddamned respect. GLADIATOR II is here and we are not unlike the cheering crowds in the coliseum... thirsty for bloodshed and desperate to be entertained. And were we n…
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The year is 2000 and the world is captivated by the return of the sword and sandal epic... who is this mysterious Australian man Russell Crowe? And most importantly, will we be entertained?? Gladiator I hardly know 'er Gladiator I'm glad he ate her and so on, and now that we've got that over and done with let's get really serious for a second: this…
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The second in Bergman's thematic trilogy, WINTER LIGHT is about the silence of God... and whomst amongst us isn't dealing with that these days? This is an incredible film that we hope you watch and enjoy, and while we are two Silly Boys we try out best to approach it seriously and honestly. Most of this episode is Ben ranting and raving about how m…
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Halloween in November yet again! Every year Alex, Ben, and our other friend also named Ben get together to do a horror movie marathon. Last year we decided to turn it into a podcast and this year we did it again just real special like for all you loyal listeners! We discuss the following spooky movies: HAXAN, BLACK SABBATH, THE BOXER'S OMEN, STIGMA…
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From BAD BOYS to the "bad boy" of Swedish cinema... from HUMAN CENTIPEDE to the Spider God... that's right, it's a dark November of the Soul with friend of the pod, future guest(?) Ingmar Bergman. Alex and Ben are tackling some real cinema for a change with Bergman's "Silence of God" trilogy. Wish us luck! Our first film of the series is 1961's THR…
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Eating shit and drinking piss and farting and shitting and pissing into each others mouths forever hooray! We've made it to the final HUMAN CENTIPEDE film and thank god for that. Joining us again is friend of the show and repeat guest Katherine Vienneau. We talk about MEGALOPOLIS, THE SUBSTANCE, and the film taking Toronto by storm THE PEE PEE POO …
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it's a spooky and fright-tastic bonus episode for you on Scary Wednesday ooooh! Ben went to some film festivals with CHERUB and it was spooooky ahhhh! and he talks about how scary it is to be a famous Hollywood celebrity OooOooOOOOoooo! and then Ben and Alex talk (from beyond the grave) about some of the absolutely bone-chilling horror films they'v…
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Dubbel zoveel! Verdubbel de pis! Het is HUMAN CENTIPEDE 2 (FULL SEQUENCE)! Alex en Ben zijn terug met een speciale gast en shit-expert Sam Edwards om het beruchte vervolg op de toch al beruchte eerste film te bespreken. Is deze film gestoorder dan het origineel? Is het grover en grappiger? Is het op zijn minst een esthetische verbetering? Je zult m…
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Scheiße! Alex und Ben gehen Arsch-zu-Mund! Genau, es ist ein neues Franchise... THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE. Vom niederländischen Regisseur Tom Six stammt dieses berüchtigte und abscheuliche Schock-O-Rama. Ist der Film wirklich gut oder ist er nur voller Scheiße? Seien Sie nächste Woche beim zweiten Teil der Reihe dabei, dem Meta THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE 2 (VOL…
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Ladies and gentlemen... I've traveled over half our province to be here tonight. I couldn't get away sooner because my new podcast was coming out on Spotify and I had to see about it. That podcast is now flowing at two thousand barrels of content and it's paying me an income of five thousand dollars a week. I have two others recording and I have si…
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It's that time of the year again (or at least it was when we recorded this, we're getting really far ahead which is great and much more convenient for us, we are busy adult guys with lives after all!) that's right, Toronto Air Show time! Cower in fear at the display of our military's might! Please excuse us as we get frustrated throughout the episo…
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Bad Boys II, Bad Boys II, whatcha gonna do when they Bad Boys II? We're back with perhaps the ultimate Bayhem experience, the purest expression of what purile pop American cinematic entertainment can offer: BAD BOYS II A truly repellent and maximalist film, one that has to be seen to be believed. What did Alex and Ben think of it? Before you find o…
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BONUS BONUS BONUS! It's a special episode for you recapping 2024's Toronto International Film Festival, the festival of festivals, the greatest cultural event in Canada, the only reason to stay alive, the glitz and glamour and stars, it's hot, it's happening, it's here for you to listen to on a Thursday and you can pretend like you were there too! …
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Bad Boys Bad Boys/Whatcha gonna do?/Whatcha gonna do when they podcast you? ayyyy what is this blank freakin' check with Griffin and frickin' David ovah heah??? No. It is The Franchisees with Ben and Alex you fucking moron. Welcome back! We're doing the first film in a brand new franchise: BAD BOYS. Michael Bay's first feature film... does he "have…
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Whoops! Forgot to upload this... blaming it on having a bad case of TIFF fever. I will update this description soon! UPDATE: We're back in ancient Greek, following the epic CGI sea(?) battles of Themistocles and Eva Green. Whoever wins, we the audience lose. Just kidding, it's not that bad it's just not that good either. What expectations could you…
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300 romans like the trojans 300 greeks fucking yeomans 300 kanye's bipolar emotions that's right baby we're back, The Franchisees are back with past and future and current guest Katherine Vienneau to discuss the second film from "vulgar auteur" Zack Snyder, 300. We're talking King Leonidas, we're talking Xerxes, we're talking Fassbender, Wenham, hu…
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Franchises were a mistake... it's time to admit it. No matter how great the original film is, eventually the rights will be purchased by Disney and they will make slop. Will we eat the slop? Yes... because we are pigs. But will we like it? Disney and Weyland-Yutani are not concerned with the answer to that question. We're back with the latest and (…
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BONUS BONUS BONUS! Do you like the part of the episode where we talk about the movies we've watched before we get to the main movie of the week? Well strap in buddy, because that's allllllll we're doing this episode! Ben and Alex have been apart on (separate) summer vacation(s) and boy howdy do they have a lot of movies to round up. Enjoy this spec…
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All our chips were on ALIEN: COVENANT baby, it's all on red, it's in gods hands now... so did it pay off? Well yes and no. Ben and Alex agree: it's a step up from PROMETHEUS and Ridley's gothic horror haunted house double android surprise is awfully good fun. What a strange franchise... we've had fun though haven't we folks. During the Weekly Movie…
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The earth was young when Prometheus, the clever Titan, created all the living creatures from a mixture of earth and water. From his imagination, he fashioned birds for the air, fish for the sea and animals for the land. However, from the image of the immortal gods, he fashioned man. Bad idea! Join us we talk about Prometheus the Titan and PROMETHEU…
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200 years after ALIEN 3 Brad Dourif clones Sigourney Weaver to extract an alien from her tummy. Thus sets the stage for the wackiest, goopiest, frenchiest ALIEN film yet. Revered French clown Jean-Pierre Jeunet directs and megahack Joss Whedon writes the cringe dialogue. Our good buddy and comedian extraordinaire Joel Edmiston joins us again to tal…
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ALIEN 3, from the twisted mind of David Fincher...? Well no, not really. From the twisted minds of 20th Century Fox more like it. And we're all worse off because of it! ALIEN 3 is a really interesting movie with a fascinatingly flawed production history. While Alex and Ben didn't particularly like it, they definitely recommend you watch it and then…
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James Cameron, hot off the success of THE TERMINATOR, makes one of the greatest sequels of all time: ALIEN$... and a franchise was born! What can you say... it's a classic. But do Alex and Ben like it? I know you're all waiting to hear what Alex and Ben have to say about ALIEN$. Here's a preview: we like it fine! It just is not the type of movie th…
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ALIEN. It's a classic, what can you say? Well that's a good question and we try to answer it with today's episode. Jordan Seccareccia joins us again to talk about just how good ALIEN is and how amazing it is that a group of talented artists came together at the exact right time to create an enduring sci-fi/horror masterpiece. But first we babble on…
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All great things must come to an end and here we are with the final film in Gus Van Sant's "Death Trilogy" LAST DAYS. Michael Pitt stars as not Kurt Cobain in a film not about Kurt Cobain's final days before his suicide. Katherine returns to talk all things Cobain, Nirvana, Van Sant, and depression/alienation. Sound fun? Well it actually is very fu…
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We're back discussing the 2nd film in Gus Van Sant's "Death Trilogy" ELEPHANT. Yes, this is his Columbine movie... yes, heavy subject matter is perhaps not our forte... but don't worry, we can still have fun right? Of course we can! Joining us for said fun is returning guest Katherine Vienneau and first time guest, longtime listener and even longer…
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We're back with a slow jam for you, the first in Gus Van Sant's acclaimed Death Trilogy, GERRY. We love Gerry, we all love Gerry, and soon you too will love Gerry, it's only a matter of time. Two friends go for a walk in the desert, what's the worst that could happen... sure would be terrible if they became lost and unmoored in a constantly changin…
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SUPER SIZE ME 2: HOLY CHICKEN! what a terrible title good god heinous title yucky very bad! And the movie's no good either, trust us. I can't imagine many of you Fanchisees out there have seen this obscure doc, seeing as how it sucks and was overshadowed by the director's self-cancellation. We always encourage playing along here but if you do, plea…
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RIP Immorgan Spurlock The Franchisees are paying our respects to one of the giants of documentary filmmaking, the 6' 2" Morgan Spurlock. Today we're revisiting the hot doc that put him on the map: SUPER SIZE ME. There was a time when eating McDonalds for 30 days and filming it could be a hit documentary... nowadays its a frickin' Mr. Beast video! T…
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The Mad Max Saga comes to a close (for now) with FURIOSA, the highly anticipated action epic that serves as a prequel and world-building expansion to 2015's FURY ROAD. Does it live up to its predecessor or fall short of expectations? Does it add much to the Mad Max universe or is it merely Fury Road DLC? How does it stack up to the sickest of all D…
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WITNESS ME! (listen to the pod) PLEASE WITNESS ME! The Mad Max Saga continues with what may be the greatest long-gap/legacy sequel of all time: MAD MAX: FURY ROAD. Max is back to begrudgingly help save the day with some new friends... Imperator Furiosa, Toast the Knowing, Cheedo the Fragile, Nux... we have all these characters. Furiosa must free th…
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Surprise! A very special... or should I say Jerry special bonus episode because we're talking Jerry Seinfeld's feature directorial debut UNFROSTED. Should I say that? Should I say "or should I say Jerry special bonus episode? Email us at thefranchiseespod@gmail.com (and follow us @thefranchisees on Instagram and Twitter) We are joined by two very s…
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Thunderdome: Two men enter, one man leaves. But today it's more like two men enter, one man already inside, three men talk into microphones, two men exit, one man stays where he is because special guest Zack Kotzer joins us to talk about MAD MAX BEYOND THUNDERDOMEhe third and, for a time, final Mad Max movie. Aunty Entity, Master Blaster, Pig Kille…
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My life fades. The vision dims. All that remains are memories. I remember a time of chaos, ruined dreams, this wasted land. But most of all, I remember The Franchisees, the men we called Alex and Ben and special guest Jordan 'Mad Max Rockatansky' Seccareccia. Mad Max 2. The Road Warrior. One of the greatest and most influential movies of all time. …
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Ladies and gentlemen, rev your engines! All the way from post-apocalyptic London, England it's 'Mad' Maxim Gertler-Jaffe, joining Benno and Lexo for a poddo about the original MAD MAX film by director George Miller. Throw a shrimp on the barbie, Australia dingo koala Malcolm Turnbull. It's a classic of independent action cinema and the beginning of…
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Chaos reigns †††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††♱††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††♱††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††♱††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††♱††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††♱†††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††††…
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[loud beating and flogging noises] ahhh! ohhh ouch ohhh nooo! ow! owww! We’re back ahhh stop oh god ow! With a new episode on a film from the twisted mind of Mel Gibson ouch! Joined ahh ohhh ow owwww by returning guests AHHH Jordan and Katherine. [flogging continues] We talk about ow ouch oh god why have you forsaken me owww the life and career of …
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He has risen again! He being Jesus Christ of course, our lord and saviour and friend of the pod. Alex and Ben are back with Part II of the epic Christ Quadrilogy where they explore weighty themes like religion, resurrection, sin, and salvation. This week we're covering Martin Scorsese's (and Paul Schrader's) THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST. Joining u…
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I loooove you Jeeeesus Chriiiiist. Jesus Christ I loooove you, yesss I dooooo. Happy April everybody! We here at The Franchisees are good, honest, god-fearing folk and have decided to celebrate the death and resurrection of friend of the pod and future guest, Jesus of Nazareth. We've picked a quartet, a tetralogy, or (much more stupidly) a quadrilo…
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Ted has risen! Ted 2 unto others as you would have Ted 2 to uh yourself. We're back with the sequel to Seth MacFarlane's lovable children's film TED, the appropriately titled TED 2. Ben was lukewarm on the first Ted film and Alex remembers disliking Ted 2 when he watched it on a plane many years ago... how will the lads feel about Ted 2 now? Well, …
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We're back this week with a new franchise, TED. Everyone's favourite Seth MacFarlane project behind Family Guy but ahead of everything else he's done. Since there's a new Ted TV series we thought we'd revisit the lovable foul-mouthed bear and see if he's still funny (or if he ever was in the first place...) We start the episode by discussing the li…
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The spice continues to flow on our latest episode: DUNE: PART TWO, the epic conclusion to Denis Villeneuve's adaptation of one book. We have a very special guest joining us this week, fellow sandman and spicelover Alex Baigent! This brings us 3/4 of the way to having the entirety of the band Westelaken on the show. Soon we shall collect them all! B…
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It's DUNE time again, the spice must flow, the podcast must uhhh ummmm be recorded and released. What a wonderful, special episode we have for you. Joining us is major spice-head Aren Bergstrom, a huge Dune fan, cinephile and fellow movie podcaster. We do talk about Dune, don't worry, but first we have an extended riff on hot button film criticism …
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Beer is the mind killer, the sleeper has awakened from a drunken nap. And many more Dune-related jokes I’m sure! We’re back with an exciting and relevant franchise: the DUNE films. This week we start by discussing (eventually) David Lynch’s 1984 adaptation. Is it a failure or a secret success… or something in between? We also touch on Alejandro Jod…
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Listen up you rat fucks, Ben has now seen all 26 of cinema god Martin Scorsese's fiction feature films. He and Alex have cooked you up a nice-a bonus episode, just like our mother's used to make. It's long, epic even... just like one of Marty's pictures. We talk about every Martin Scorsese film here, from MEAN STREETS to TAXI DRIVER to GOODFELLAS t…
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Martin Scorsese baby. The god! We're back with his 1986 cool guy classic, THE COLOR OF MONEY. Paul Newman is back as Fast Eddie Felcher, older and wiser (?), not playing pool but anymore but still hustling. He meets a young, hot shot hot shit pool prodigy Tom Cruise and takes him and his streetwise girlfriend under his wing. Can Fast Eddie show the…
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We're back and squeezing in a short "franchise" before DUNE unto others as we'd have DUNE unto ourselves. We chose something good for a bit of a change of pace: THE HUSTLER. Directed by Robert Rossen (who joins the Elia Kazan club of Communist name namers who also made some great films), THE HUSTLER is a film about having that grindset, the money m…
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Jurassic World Dominion NO COLON You don't have to watch this movie! You could go outside! You don't have to have seen this movie to enjoy this podcast, we don't even talk about it until an hour in! Don't do this to yourself, you're better than that! I'm serious, don't bother! Do some chores, call your mom, get a start on your taxes for god's sake.…
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